THE BEST IDEA EVER!!!

you guys!

we are SO interrupting out regularly scheduled programming to bring you THE BEST IDEA EVER, i SWEAR!!!

ready? okay: i think we should all have a wedding!

no, of COURSE no one would actually get MARRIED. we'd just skip that part. but we could all come and dress up and get a band and have a big ole' wedding reception! we could even bring a gift and give it to someone there.

my thoughts on this are thus:

  • for those readers who've not yet gotten married, this takes the pressure off in lots of ways. you can tell your friends and family you are having a wedding, and leave the rest to mystery. or invite them, whatever. the point is, you can have your first wedding and then don't have to get all confused later, trying to figure out whether you're more excited for the event than the marriage itself. by the time you actually get married, you will have already had the excitement of the wedding taken care of.

  • for those readers in my boat -- married, but now single and dating -- it takes all the pressure off of hoping for another ring, you know? plus, for those of us who may be ever-so-slightly jaded, along the lines of "i'm never doing THAT again" (wedding, not marriage), well, now you can! but you won't have all the pressure of being a bride! you'll just have the opportunity to reap the benefits of the party.

  • for those who ARE married, whatever! weddings are the new monogamy. or something. (work with me here.)

  • we all need to get together and celebrate anyway. i mean, look, if i said, "i'm having a party" most of you would not be able to trek to san francisco to come to it. no one travels THAT far for a party, especially not for someone they only know in the invisible sense, right? but a wedding? and what if it's YOUR wedding? you'd HAVE to go. work will understand.

bridal gowns will be optional, as will be tuxedos...but can't you just see it now? 500 invisible internet friends come together for the first time, ALL in full wedding regalia? all of us wandering around a reception hall in wedding gowns? HAHAHAHAHAHA.

so yep. let's pick a place convenient to all of us (or none of us, such as mexico), and plan it right now!

Comments

  1. Hmmm... I can think of the band that should play this big party...


    :)

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  2. Oh if we're going to do a wedding, I think we should totally go tropical. Chances are good that the already-been-marrieds and one-day-will-be-marrieds, didn't/won't go away to get married, plus this way we don't have to pay for an extra honeymoon.

    BAM! We're already in the Caribbean, how convenient.

    And I say it should be in earlyish August (before hurricane season). And someone pick the specifics...I'm off to get a bride red wedding gown. (And lots of liquor for the celebrating).

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  3. This reminds me of the episode of Sex in the City where Carrie's Mahnolos get stolen at her friend's baby shower and the friend blames her for having bought shoes that were so expensive. So, Carrie calls her up and says, "I just wanted to let you know that I'm getting married! To myself, and I'm registered at Mahonolo Blahnik."

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  4. K, fabulous idea. Even though I just got married so recently that our album JUST showed up yesterday both the husband and I think the wedding was so fun we want another one. Is it ok to bring spouses?

    And since I didn't have the cajones to get married in Vegas the first time...I say we do it there...plus that'll make the fact that we don't know each other in "real life" less weird. We can call it a conference, and play craps in our wedding gowns!

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  5. maybe *that's* what you can do for your birthday!

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  6. I am off to register at Goodwill, Value Village and the Dollar Store.

    I don't want to live above my means my new life.

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  7. It is the best idea ever!

    Vegas, baby.

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  8. You have lost your damn mind. BACK AWAY FROM THE BOXED WINE. Can't we have a big barbecue? Or a hoe-down (heh. I said 'hoe') or how about a nice drunken orgy or gluttony and sin?

    I look *terrible* in white.

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  9. I'm skipping the wedding and going straight to the honeymoon. :P

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  10. NO WE CANNOT JUST HAVE A BBQ because people will not get on a plane for a barbeque EVEN IF you have authentic SOUTHERNERS at the grill dropping burgers all over the place.

    gluttony and sin, though -- that might be plane-worthy.

    i dunno. maybe you should just wear red. and maybe a tiara.

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  11. This is exactly why I've decided to skip the wedding part all together and just do the reception. We'll have the legal technical part in the hotel room beforehand or something... Everyone just wants to go to the party anyway right?

    And I totally vote Vegas. And I'm not wearing white! (emphasized with a foot stomp!)

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  12. Drinking this early in the day was not a good IDEA for you today :)

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  13. I agree with Vegas. There are cheap flights to Vegas from everywhere. Even nerdy scientists have conferences there now.

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  14. lol.

    freaks.

    you and that changeseeker are all a bunch of neocom feaks.

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  15. Fine. Whatever. I'll wear something slutty and red and embarrass all ya'll blushing-ass brides.

    Bridezillas. All ya'll. I feel like I have been abandoned out here on Embittered Island... ;)

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  16. I'm with dena. I want to get lucky at the prom, then throw up on someone's shoes. But I am not wearing anything white. Because hi. Lighting.

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  17. um, "lightening"

    no I am not drinking at work. whoops,.

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  18. Vegas is perfect! I was maid of honor at my best friend's wedding in Vegas 3 years ago. And seeing as I'm always the bridesmaid and never the bride I believe I have 3 or 4 dresses available if anyone needs one. All are size 22-26, though. I think I'll wear the pink one from my mom's wedding...I like that one the most. even though it's pink.

    Oh, I hope I can make it to this shindig. I've missed the others.

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  19. Kristy! Your blog is on fiyah!

    Maybe we can have our bachelorette party at BlogHer?

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  20. Hey I still have my wedding dress! It didn't last the first time ...that pesky adultery thing got in the way....I think I could have it taken in....let's go!

    What other time will I ever be able to wear it again?

    He He

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  21. i vote vegas too. and y'all, wedding dresses look good on anyone. it is the only time i would wear white, cause there's all that poof in the trunk and shrinking in the stomach and more poof in bustier. i wish i could wear mine again, but alas, pregnancy increased my rib cage by two inches and i will never fit into it again. but seeing as how it ended in divorce, i'd like to wear it again to a party that won't end in tears. vegas baby!!!

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  22. omg. I *heart* the kiki.

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  23. I have an invitation idea(filched from the amazing Bad Girl's Guide to the Party Life, by Cameron Tuttle):
    "Somebody's gettin' married..."
    (inside)
    "And it sure as hell ain't me!"

    Send it, then register all over the place(Yay Target!) I'm voting Vegas for the location and red & sequin-y for the dresses


    Also, I am madly jealous of Shull o' fit's Prom experience- the most memorable part of my prom was when my necklace slide fell down the front of my dress and was presumed missing, only to reappear after the dance. The boyfriend at the time was sulky because I was more excited about that than about his presence.

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  24. I vote for Vegas; women dress in the tux and the men in the dress. LOL Make them look pretty and worry about their hair and make-up.
    How much of the bill will be footed by good ole mom and dad, or are we pretending it's all the second time around or an adult child wedding, where mom and dad thought you were never getting married and spent the money? LOL
    Scarlett - new reader.
    P.S. I am from the South and BBQ (as in smoked pig) does sound good.

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  25. I was going to get married in Vegas (because I was born and raised there), but that fell through.

    I think it would be fantastic to do it in Vegas.

    Think about it, so many other people are already there to get married, and are walking around in full wedding regalia, we could see if they want to join us and the celebration could just keep growing and growing!

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  26. Mexico is convenient for me! I'm down in San Diego! :) Crazy thing is... i'm already planning a bridal shower for my best friend who lives in Nor Cal. :) Multiple weddings! Weee!!

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  27. how about milwaukee in october or november

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  28. This is awesome. Vegas, all sorts of dresses, it will be great!

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  29. Christ, we need to call Whinger and have her look for a location for us, stat.

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  30. Hey K,

    You had said in a reply to my comment on the previous post that you do not mind discussing on a different point of view, as long that view point was not a rash judgement.

    I perfectly accept and it makes sense to me. I'd written in my comment though "I've been following this blog for months now" just to indicate that it did not appear as a rash judgement though. Nevertheless, all I really had to say was I noticed the "birds-of-a-feather-flock-together" syndrome in the reply comments on your blog. Once again, I have nothing against that too, it is just close to obvious that like minded people would follow the blog generally and share your views.

    Overall, I'd say once again that you have a knack of writing. And personally, I do not have anything against your views, I in fact like to see how the chain of thoughts goes. I try in my attempts not to pass judgement, and post observations.

    All my best wishes, do well, keep well, take good care of yourself, and keep writing!! I'll be following the blog as usual :)

    Nike

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  31. disney world??

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  32. Julie, I like the way you think. I'm close to Disney. But really, that's no reason to make anyone come to this godforsaken state.

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  33. Best. Idea. EVAH! I'm in NY but I'm game. Frisco sounds good to me.

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  34. How's the idea of meeting at the great symbol of love (The Taj Mahal @ Agra in India)? That helps the otherwise geographically challenged (from USA) like me to still stay in contention.

    Nike (India)

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  35. hell yeah!! i have wedding issues (skipped out on two engagememts so far...) so i'm really digging your idea! plan away and i'll be there!

    it's one of those ideas that's crazy enough to actually work.

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  36. AWESOME idea K! I vote VEGAS all the way.

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  37. Okay, I vote for vegas with the men dressed as Elvis and the women in our old Prom dresses! I have often threatened to have a "Single girl hooked up with man who has been married 3 times and doesn't want to do it again" Shower and Reception. I have already sworn off baby and bridal showers.

    Brilliant idea, keep me posted.
    psst: gonna be in Vegas in the fall anyway. I'm just sayin.

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  38. My vote also is for Vegas. I get to wear the wedding dress I bought for the wedding I never actually went through with. Which is great because I love that dress! Whee!

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  39. I'm down. This really IS the perfect idea.

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  40. oh dear lord how I love this idea.
    and, it's perfect for me anyways since the only reason I want a wedding is for the:
    dress
    tiara
    cake
    booze.

    Vegas would be perfect.

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  41. Brides are mainly looking for footwear and wedding gowns. Similarly any collection are available for wedding.

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