My New Favorite Chore

okay. so i have about nine bazillion things to write about and no time and no idea how to get all the thoughts out there without writing 300 pages at a time.

i do like the way Whinger writes her stuff. so taking a page from her book blog, maybe i'll just start throwing things out there till i can spend more time writing things that are um, you know, in some way "constructed."

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i have new favorite domestic chore. are you so proud? of course you aren't because you don't know what i'm going to write but you have some idea that whatever it is, it's not going to be a real chore.

and of course, you're right.

because my new favorite "chore" is called "doing laundry." and the way that works is, you gather up all the clothes you've been meaning to wash for five-and-a-half weeks, and then you stuff them in a bag. and then you haul the bag down your three storey walk-up, and then to the corner. and then you cross the street.

now. if you knew where exactly i lived, you'd maybe say here, "but kristy, the laundromat is up the street on the same side as you. where are you going with your laundry bag? are you really THAT directionally impaired?" to which i'd reply, "yes, but that is not why i am crossing the street."

and i would go on to tell you that the dry cleaners across the street has this thing called "wash and fold." and it's really maybe the greatest thing that has ever existed.

because, see, where laundry used to involve spending the better half of a weekend day or an entire week night sorting and lugging and separating and machine-wrangling and quarter-hording and diligent load-watching (to ensure that no one would move your stuff or take your stuff while you're holed up in the world's most depressing building ever constructed), it now involves:

• shoving your clothes into a bag
• walking said bag across the street
• saying to the lovely chinese lady, "wash and fold, please." and also, "sure, wednesday is fine."

and then you hand her your bag and a few days later you return and everything is clean and folded and wrapped in paper and it's completely miraculous.

seriously, i would bring my dishes to a wash and fold if i could.

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the girl who doesn't own a grocery volunteered to make the sweet potatoes, the broccoli casserole, the cranberry sauce, a flaky pastry and cheese h'ors d'oeuvre, and a dessert. for 12 people.

this is what the holidays do to me.

actually, i live sort of a double life. mostly the other, darker half stays hidden...but occassionally the other half rears her head, often around this time of year.

someday, when we are ready, i will tell you about her. but in the meantime, just know that the other half is rather frightening. she's the type who doesn't just own one glue gun, but several, in varying sizes. and also maybe a creme brulee torch and a set of ramekins. and an embosser, for making professional stamps. and possibly is also the kind of girl who'd MAKE HER OWN CHRISTMAS WRAPPING PAPER. or buy furniture at flea markets for the purpose of antique-ing them. she may also be the kind of girl who'd have a subscription to martha stewart living and wait with bated breath for it to be delivered each month.

she's the half who hand makes all her own christmas cards.

unfortunately, there's that other half of me -- the one who runs the show. the one who orders take-out instead of buying groceries and who will acknowledge that there ARE hand-made cards, but will not manage to find a way to actually mail them. and so the darker half mostly remains overshadowed, and only pokes through every so often.

like now. to go tend to sweet potatoes.