I Am (Almost) A Pawn!

so no, not quite. but really almost!

what? you want context?

well fine. for those of you just joining us (all both of you), i have recently-ish* begun dating a comedian. and this has, perhaps ironically, caused me to think way more seriously about a lot of things.

like being funny.

so i ventured to take an intro class in stand-up. (something i'd ALWAYS wanted to do and NEVER come close to having the chutzpah to try.)

and tonight, for our final assignment in this class, we had to perform a 3-4 minute set. on stage. with a mic. for our class/audience.

and oh. my. holy. god.

do you have any idea how terrifying that is? i mean, i knew it was coming. eventually, i was going to have to write material, and perform material, and like, actually go from being in the audience (making snarky comments about how funny everyone isn't) to being on stage myself. because that's what i signed up for. that's what i wanted to see if i could do.

and so i sat there tonight, waiting to go. and it was excrutiating. every doubt i've ever had ran through my head at a rapid pace, and i totally envisioned myself walking out.

but i didn't.

i went.

i got up on stage, and i talked to the audience and i made them laugh (a little) and i didn't trip or throw up or collapse or suck.

i wasn't great, of course. but i did it. and i guess that means i know i can do it again.

so the next step is to sign up for an open mic night. (well, and sure, actually show up for it and go ON when i'm supposed to, but whatever. technicalities.) and then when i have done that?

THEN i can consider myself an official "pawn**."



**"Before there can be Kings or Queens of Comedy, there must be Pawns."


  1. Congratulations! This IIF is very proud! Wish I could have seen it in real life.

  2. way to go. glad you didn't trip, or collapse, that would have been bad. (and I'm sure you were nowhere near sucking.)

  3. I am also very proud of you. Congratulations!!! Overcoming your fear of performing is the first step towards true greatness. PLus you didn't puke! Chyaaa! Can we IIFs get a glimpse of some of the gags? I mean, since we be all over the map and you're out on that "other" coast and all. Anyhows KEEP AT IT!
    Tons of love,

  4. Good for you! I am a former neg poster here, but doing stand-up takes guts - so you deserve some props.

  5. Kristy - have you ever considered comedy writing? Pros: you'd be great at it, no anxiety about performing, and it seems like a natural fit for you, given your talent at writing. Cons: ummmm...I'm at a loss. Anyway, food for thought.

  6. I thought you might be interested in this:


    Ciao Bella!

  7. Congrats babe!!! That takes great big kahuna's. Please e-vite me to the big opening. I promise I won't flake. You know...the reason I don't even have my own blog is because I can't handle any sort of criticism..even constructive. I prefer to be the comic bellied up to the bar where I can just tell someone to eff off if they don't like my humor and that's even funny in bar humor!! You go gurrrl!!!

  8. I'm in awe. I could as soon operate on some guy's brain as do stand-up. Here, take my balls--I'm not using them!

    congrats! :-)

  9. that is so cool kristy!! and extra cool that you didn't hurl. i have to "stand-up" in front of people every night (professional server extraordinaire) and sometimes it's just nervewracking. glad you were able to do it and get some laughs. the next will be a little easier, and the next time...you know.

  10. dear almost pawn, i think that is probably one of the hardest, uh, and more importantly BRAVEST things to do EVER! i am so proud of you to have the balls to just do it. i am an artist and understand to a certain degree what it is like to put yourself out there but i think comedy is a whole different realm. jokes. silence. courage. more jokes. laugh (maybe)...the excrusiating pain of it all. soon-to-be-pawn, you are funny...don't doubt yourself. i wish i was in san fran to support you on your real official open mic night.

  11. Yay! Alright! Congrats Kristy. I could never do that.

    Standup? No I can do that, it's the funny part I can't do.

    Undr(Did I ever tell you you're my heroooo)

    PS I'm glad you had the cojones* to do it! *j sounds like h but you knew that.

  12. that's so brave! excellent work!


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