Friday, February 27, 2009

Plus-Sized Pregnancy, Plus-Sized Fears

In the last couple weeks, I seemed to have popped.


Me @ 22 weeks.
It is absolutely amazing to me that my belly protrudes farther than my boobs.
I hardly believed such a phenomenon could exist.


To be perfectly honest (as, let's face it, I usually am) I have been afraid to post pictures of my pregnant self. I've been afraid to take pictures of my pregnant self.

I don't like to be photographed at this size. I am not now (nor will I ever be) happy to be so overweight. I prefer as few reminders as possible. And once I got pregnant and my weight started shifting, I didn't so much look "pregnant" as I did look "differently heavy." Hard to feel glowy when you just feel fat in a new way.

But! Now that I have popped such that the (trained) eye can tell I'm not (just) carrying a red-wine enabled spare tire under there, I feel a lot better about the whole thing.

And you know what? I also kind of feel vindicated.

I don't want to go off on an angry rant about how, because I'm overweight, I have been given about thirty bazillion warnings of how this pregnancy will be bad, hard, challenging, unhealthy, etc. (Note: my doctor didn't say such things, actually; my web-reading, plus-size-book-buying self found all this "research" that said those things.)

But you know? That information is real and scary. I've felt I I've had every reason to expect an uphill battle.

And yes, I've been ashamed, too.

God, I hate writing that. I hate thinking it, I hate feeling it, I hate admitting it. But taking pictures of my body is just not something I've been okay with for the last several years, period. I always hide from cameras. And now that I'm pregnant and my body isn't just my own anymore...it's suddenly perfectly okay and expected for people to want to see pictures of me?

That's a really hard transition to make. I'm working on it. I'm getting there.

My point is: I entered into this pregnancy with all kinds of body shame and body fear.

Back when I wasn't even sure I could GET pregnant because of my family's genetic history, the fancy specialist told me the number one thing I could do to help with the process would be to lose weight. I am sure there's research to back up his claim in general, I won't deny that. I will, however, point out that my specific issue is linked directly to my genetic makeup, and my incredibly fit, trim, never-had-one-extra-ounce-of-fat-on-her sister is no longer able to conceive for this reason. So telling me to go on a diet is maybe not the most useful piece of medical advice in the world.

It does plant the seed, though. The "If something goes wrong, it was probably your fault" seed.





Maybe I've been projecting. I err on the side of crazy, so it's possible. I've just...since I discovered I was pregnant, I have been convinced that something would go wrong. Because my genes aren't healthy, because my body isn't healthy, because for a million reasons, I've been weighed down by doubt and fear and a near refusal to believe this is actually happening. And it seemed that -- especially in the very beginning -- the doctors were treating me as though I should be cautious, that I shouldn't expect too much (of course they never said this, it's just how it came across to me).

But now here it is, here I am, over the half-way point.

And I'm still waiting for the YOU'RE OVERWEIGHT AND GOING TO HAVE A HORRIBLE HORRIBLE PREGNANCY (boogeda! boogeda!) things to happen. You know, the things I expected to happen, the things I -- shamefully -- assumed I deserved to have happen.


* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Honestly, looking up what can happen to you if you're overweight and pregnant is like asking a hungry news reporter what they think about the state of our economy. There's instant frothing and worst-case-scenario-ing and BEVERYAFRAIDing.

Let's play a game. We'll call it, "You're overweight, so you must be having problems with _____!" And then let's fill in the blanks.
  • You're overweight so you must be having problems with...high blood pressure!
This is usually the first thing that comes up when you do any research about being overweight and being pregnant. Because it's the scariest, because it can actually lead to a sort of pregnancy "toxemia" that can be fatal to the mother and baby.

Now, I do NOT mean to make light of this serious condition (preeclampsia). But what seems to be buried in this blood-pressure research is that it's usually only something to worry about if you have a pre-existing history or chronic hypertension, and even then it's likely that you will have a healthy pregnancy.

Yeah. Oh.

So while I am most definitely on the lookout for this to crop up as a potential threat to my pregnancy, I feel I should also point out that my blood pressure has actually gone down since I got knocked up. And, you know, stopped working. Hmm. Come to think of it, this is the lowest my blood pressure's been since I officially entered the workforce. (Wait, you don't mean to suggest that blood pressure might have to do with outside stressors and not just your weight, do you?)

  • You're overweight so you must be having problems with...diabetes!
Again, I do not for one minute think that diabetes isn't serious or that weight/diet doesn't have a profound effect on it.

However, gestational diabetes is a slightly different story. It's right up there with high blood pressure in terms of its boogeda! boogeda! YOUWILLGETTHIS-ness.

But yet, just with high blood pressure, all the studies actually say that the best predictor of gestational diabetes is -- you guessed it -- having a family or personal history of diabetes.

I've personally known two people who had gestational diabetes, and neither of them were overweight.

As for me, my first glucose test was perfect. I have to go back for a second test in a couple weeks, though, so who knows. Maybe I'll discover that eating three packs of Sour Patch Kids a day hasn't been a good idea...

  • You're overweight so you must be having problems with...weight gain and that GIANT baby you're going to have!
I don't, actually, know what kind of research is at play here. I do know that larger people do tend to have larger babies, so I won't debate that. However, I don't know if there's any real evidence that suggests overweight women take greater liberties or gain more weight during pregnancy than their thinner counterparts.

I find it hard to believe that any woman these days thinks that being pregnant means she can eat or drink anything she wants. But I also find it hard to believe that "thin" women are ANY LESS PRONE to indulging themselves or giving into cravings than overweight women are.

As for me, my belly is quite obviously growing well. Meanwhile, I have gained one whole pound.

So, well, yeah.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Apparently I did need to go on an angry rant.

I just...

Of all the things I expected, having a relatively easy and healthy pregnancy was not one of them.

Oh, I have my aches and pains. I am always tired. I have bizarre skin irritations and hormonal fluctuations that make no sense. I cry at mops. I forget everything and get lost within a five-block radius of my own home. Finding a comfortable position to sleep in is becoming a greater challenge every night. I can't wear "normal" pants anymore at all. My boobs are more sore than they've ever been, and will eventually be the size of my head. I want pineapple most of the time. I miss gin.

But...I have had no morning sickness. I haven't thrown up once. My ultrasounds have been normal. Every test, including the one for the baby's Fragile-X, have come back totally fine. Her heartbeat is good and strong and she is very, very active. I am perfectly healthy.

I am finally starting to believe that maybe, just maybe, I will remain perfectly healthy and the baby will be born without any major complications. Maybe all the genetic stuff was just precautionary. Maybe being overweight really isn't an indicator of how healthy I am or what kind of pregnancy I am destined to have.

Maybe I should start taking more pictures.


70 comments:

  1. This is awesome.You look great. And tell all those books to shove it!

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  2. I think you look soooo cute! You should embrace your pregnancy belly and take lots of pictures....your growing belly is a beautiful thing! You look absolutely amazing and beautiful!

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  3. I think you look cute too! Take lots of pictures of your preggo belly!!

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  4. Golleee I wanna jump through the internet, hug you, hold you, and get the buggers of fear imposed doubts the hell outa yo head woman. Seriously. This is a time when you oughta be feeling the beauty, grace, wonder, and absolute indescribable phenomenon of birthing...WATCH what you take into thought. Vital to watch this. YOU define your reality. Not the news/research. Shift gears. Do not get caught up in the fear rage. TRUST your life, your babies' life to the care, nurturing, and governance of the universe and get those thoughts still. You are deserved rant after rant as ever you need..but eventually, when you're able, get STILL, get FEARLESS, get sooo much COMFORT from feeling SAFE.Your pregnancy is being supported, governed, nurtured..as naturally as the ebbing and flowing of the currents, wind, and air...B R E A T H E...you are a beautiful inspiration to soo many women. This is a moment when you are being thanked for all you have ever given to womanhood and to the world..with the gift of caring for your own little one. Love to you sooo much.

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  5. YAY for round, HEALTHY, pregnant belly shots! :)

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  6. Also, just curious - did you and Ish decide on a name (I'm not asking you to share until she's here, just wondering if you guys have decided yet)?

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  7. I love any and all pictures of pregnant women's bellies! Keep them coming.

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  8. I am so glad you wrote this. I have all these fears about becoming pregnant since I am overweight. Recently I did some research and found that Lane Bryant and Motherhood Maternity both carry plus size maternity clothes, and that made me feel better about the superficial side of things, but the medical stuff? This is the first time I've read a perspective like this and felt like wait, maybe I don't need to freak out about this quite as much. Obviously I want to be as healthy as possible before I get pregnant, but that doesn't mean I have to freak out about being pregnant while overweight. I shared this on Google Reader so that other people can get this perspective too, because it is so valuable. Thank you. And PS, I think you look fantastic.

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  9. As if you don't have enough to worry about, being pregnant? How about giving you space to have normal fears, like sending your child into early therapy, making your child a serial killer, dropping her/him on his/her head one too many times....

    (Um, not sure if those are normal, or just my fears about having kids...)

    (I apologize if I've posted a bazillion times--it kept not posting, so I'm re-writing my post, but it could be that you get outrage from me three or four times... Then you'll be thinking "great, now I have angry psycho stalkers to worry about, too!")

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  10. You are beautiful and your baby will be beautiful. In fact, I've seen the comment on a fat acceptance blog that when a mom sees her child as beautiful and then sees herself in her child...she can start to accept that she, herself, may be beautiful. Fat and beautiful are not incompatible! Maybe you can start this process now?

    Congratulations and good luck with everything.

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  11. Kristy - you are beautiful! Take more photos - pleeeeeeease!

    As for being overweight, genetics, pre-enclampsia, and gestational diabetes...my bestest-best friend (who is 42) is at this very moment in labor with Noah Joseph Keene, to be born on a GLORIOUS winter day in Salt Lake City.

    She was overweight, took 7 years to get pregnant, has a history of genetic disorders, had high blood pressure, gestational diabetes, weird rashes that keep her awake at night, lost 3 babies before concieving Noah, tried all kinds of ways to get pregnant, and finally gave up and accepted that it was Gods will that she not have another child...then...she got pregnant.

    Please-take care of yourself, Pete and baby...you're going to be fine!

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  12. Wow. Wow. This is exactly the thoughts that I had before and during my pregnancy. I was perfectly healthy other than being overweight.

    You are beautiful and you should take lots of pictures. I wish I had taken more.

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  13. You look gorgeous and your baby belly is so cute! Nothing to be ashamed of here.

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  14. i remember when you posted a picture of your bare butt and i about died from total envy that you could do that. i caught a glipse of my bare butt in the mirror about a month ago...took a week for my corneas to heal.

    you are such a brave woman. i respect you for getting out there and putting it on the screen. i know you respect yourself for it too. embrace your big round self baby!!! you rock. and that giant baby you're gonna have will rock too. i was an overweight preggy and i never got diabetes or high blood pressure or anything bad except an addiction to mcdonalds fries. they are of the devil.

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  15. You and your preggy belly are just cute as bug's ears. (And those are pretty darned cute!).

    You will be fine! I'm happy for you! :-)

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  16. You look great and it sounds like you are doing great! Don't read too much. Once I got past 20 weeks or so I kind of stopped reading pregnancy books and moved on to books about what to do once the baby is actually HERE.

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  17. You have every right to hope for and believe that you will have a perfectly normal healthy gloriously glowing pregnancy and baby.

    My heart breaks that you should feel all those negative things. You and your baby bump are beautiful.

    Congratulations again and again and again

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  18. So many things I want to say that I can't seem to put into words, except that your writing is beautiful, your soul is beautiful, and you are beautiful. Thank you for sharing your (universal) struggles so openly. You are going to be a terrific mom to your little girl. <3

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  19. Take more pictures. I promise you will not regret it.

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  20. I agree with all of the above.
    Kristy you are a beautiful woman, your spirit is strong, and I wish that all the 'studies' and 'research' made you feel safer and more confident in your body and in the little person growing inside you.

    You are strong and intelligent and are concerned and are doing the very best for yourself and your baby and Ish.

    Keep doing that.

    And trusting in your abilities. They have brought you through so much, you will continue to not just survive, but thrive.

    And be an awesome Mama :)

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  21. You and your bump are beautiful. Revel in this miraculous time, when your body is creating life. That, and enjoying your new marriage, are all you need to focus on.

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  22. Holy shit. You're pregnant.

    I mean, I KNEW, of course.

    But...there she is. Right there.

    Why do I suddenly want to put my cheek on your belly? Like, for hours?

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  23. You look fabulous! You are bright, funny, determined, happily married, and carrying an amazing miracle within your body. Let yourself BE happy! You deserve it!

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  24. I think most of the large or overweight women I know gained dramatically less weight than the skinny gals I know. I think (no, I have no research for this) that heavy gals don't have that "OH GOD! I can EAT now!" thing that a lot of skinny gals have. I know a gal who normally weighs about 105 pounds who gains at least 45 pounds every time she's pregnant. That can't be good for her.

    Take TONS of photos, and then tuck them away. If later you regret them, keep them locked away. It is so much worse not to take photos, and then regret it afterward.

    Take care, and keep your chin up because you are beautiful.

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  25. You look great...really great!!

    I too am pregnant (21 wks/having a girl too) and overweight. I have been feeling the EXACT same way about just looking fat to the outside world that doesn't know I'm pregnant. I almost want to wear a shirt that reads, "no really, I'm pregnant" just so people know.

    I think I'm starting the popping phase now and you give me hope girl, thank you for the pictures, thank you for making me feel like there's another pregnant woman just like me out there in this world!!OHHH - and your comment about your belly being larger than your boobs, I'm looking forward to that too ..my boobs are more giant than ever before (and they really didn't need to grow this much)

    Also,I've been told by a friend that had gest. diabetes (who was not overweight mind you)...it's more to do with your hormones rather than what you eat...so enjoy your sour patch kids:) Also, eat 'em now..cause if you do get it - you can't eat anything good.

    Cheers to your healthy and easy pregnancy...mine has been great too!!(clink with a virtual wine glass) ((oh how I'd like a glass of wine!!))

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  26. Please keep posting pictures! You're beautiful, I can't wait to read more about your baby, and DON'T LET THE RESEARCH GET TO YOU! I was a basketcase about everything when I was pregnant, and I still am now that my son is here and I'm only just beginnning to realize it's not worth it. Just enjoy everything and don't read magazines or websites about it. Even though I totally do. They just make people crazy.

    And take pictures! Even if you don't share them! I felt so fat and icky while I was pregnant, and so I didn't take any at all and now I totally wish I had.

    Isn't it all exciting?

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  27. I'm a plus-sized pregnant woman, and my doctor has told me she wishes more women were like me. (OK, she told me that with my last pregnancy, which I have trademarked as "world's easiest pregnancy" and not this one which can be called "hell" - but not because of anything to do with my weight.)

    All the overweight women I know tend to gain less weight than the skinny ones. Often the skinny ladies' bodies are all "OMG, I can finally hang on to calories" and they gain 60 lbs or so. I gained 20 lbs with WEP (which I had lost by the end of the first week post-partum), and have actually LOST 10 lbs with this one.

    My blood pressure? Great. Gestational diabetes test? Negative. Big baby (with WEP)? OK, you got me on that one, but since hubby is 6'3" tall, I'm calling genetics. This baby seems to be smaller so far.

    All that, and I still hate having my picture taken. Pregnant or not.

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  28. I say naked pictures!!!!
    BTW- it isn't okay to eat what you want through pregnancy? And breastfeeding? And several years past breastfeeding? Well, I'm finally getting the picture that my body isn't burning all those calories anymore, but....

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  29. I too can totally identify with you. I got pregnant (unplanned) and was overweight to the point I hated my self image. I gained 35 more pounds and delivered a perfect seven pound baby boy. My blood pressure was perfect, if not low, throughout the pregnancy- even while waiting for my unscheduled c-section when my breech baby came 2.5 weeks early. I had zero morning sickness. My fingers and feet didn't swell. I didn't have gd and ate whatever I wanted (including sweet, glorious sweets!).

    I know it's not how you imagined you'd look, but trust me, the bigger that belly gets and the more you feel the baby move- the weight won't matter as much. Plus, if it's any consolation, all my baby weight was gone by my six week pp appt. That is incredible motivation to keep losing.

    Chin up sister, you're carrying a human in your belly... Relish every moment. Congratulations.

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  30. I am so excited for you, and Ish, and your baby! What a revelation! What a revolution! Read those books . . . and select what nuggets (few though they may be) that are useful and the rest toss as filler. And keep that in mind when the pregnancy has come and gone and the "raising" begins. Because there is no end to the books that are out there to tell you what you've done wrong as a parent and how someone who has never met you can fix it!

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  31. Take more pictures of your beautiful, pregnant, glowy self

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  32. You look beautiful, sweetie.

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  33. Yay for bellies! Well, just the one belly.

    My cousin has gone through 2 pregnancies, once with a set of twins and once with just the single baby. She was overweight before both of them. She LOST weight with each pregnancy. I think if she had breastfed the twins she would have lost even more weight, but honestly, keeping up with the two of them being on completely different schedules (you know, because they decided when they wanted stuff) wouldn't have worked well for her.

    BUT, she only has gestational diabetes through the first pregnancy. And a mild scare with her blood pressure. Her second one she had no problems at all.

    I'm sure that you will be fine and just you know, enjoy the craziness. Honestly, this could be the only time EVER that women are allowed to be completely psychotic and it's greeted with, 'Aw, honey, it's just the pregnancy hormones.' and not "crazy bitch" looks. :)

    As for mops, I know what you mean about that mop. I wanted to hug it. And I hate mopping.

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  34. You look fabulous! I love pics of your pregnant, lovely self! I'm so excited for you -- the fact that you are having a healthy pregnancy is something to CELEBRATE, not second-guess yourself at. All these IIFs are chomping at the bit to see your "spot" out in the real world, so take care of the little one, take care of YOU, and get Ish to make you a gin-less drink, with promises to add lots and lots of gin once the little one is here! Cheers to you for being so brave.

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  35. Bad stuff can happen to any pregnant woman. And any pregnant woman can scare herself to DEATH surfing the internet. It isn't just you and it isn't just the weight thing. What you're feeling is pretty gosh darn normal for all women.

    Take more photos Kristy.

    You're gorgeous today, you were gorgeous six months ago, you're going to be gorgeous six months from now.

    Be happy. Enjoy this moment and the next.

    xoxoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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  36. gestational diabetes is a slightly different story.

    When I worked obgyn they'd come out YELLING: I HAVE DIABETES!
    I'd try to be somewhat casual about it, but then they got MAD.
    Yes, gestational is very different.
    ~Mary

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  37. You are beautiful and I'm thrilled to see some belly pics! You should take tons, if for no other reason than to look back and remember this time of life, ya know?

    Also, I love it that Ish posted here! Obviously someone thinks you are sexy and wonderful just as you are since last I heard that whole immaculate conception thing was a one time fluke.

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  38. I LOVE that last picture. I didn't take nearly enough pictures during my pregnancy. On the day I went into labor, I had gained a total of ONE POUND.

    And yeah. I'm DEFINITELY a plus-size chick.

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  39. we wouldn't be women if we didn't worry.

    and yes, definitely post more pics!!

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  40. One really stupid assumption that people make is that an overweight person is in a constant state of getting fatter, rather than understanding that the person is likely maintaining a fairly constant weight just like everyone else.

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  41. You look gorgeous and happy. Tell everyone to shove it. I know someone who has both high blood pressure and is on the borderline of gestational diabetes. She's slightly overweight, but has had high blood pressure since before the pregnancy and has a family history of diabetes...no one knows what the future holds.

    Crossing my fingers that things continue to go well for you guys. And how cute is Pete-ish? Cute.

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  42. hey, you--try to stop worrying and definitely stop being shamed! You are doing a great job so far and while the last half won't get better (the uncomfortableness is unbelievable, but I think that's so you aren't scared about delivering!), it's all down-hill now! And maybe lay off on the reading. LOL I actually had to laugh at this post, because I am the only person I know who refused to read the "What to Expect" books because they scared me so badly with their "what might go wrong with you baby" stories. Rant away whenever you need (and when you are pregnant, it seems to happen more frequently-hee, hee!) and take care of you and the little one. You are gonna be a GREAT momma!

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  43. I have taken a belly picture once a month for my whole pregnancy. OK, my husband has actually taken the pictures, but I gather you know what I mean. The first few made me hate my body even more than I already did because yes, it did just look like a different kind of fat.

    But then, around Month #5, I started to see what was really going on... My shape was changing because OMG, I am growing a person in there. She's wriggly and kicky and all sorts of awesome and my shape is changing because I am giving her life. I've stopped hating my body now because I know it's her causing the change. I have 7 weeks to go, and I hope I can gain the same acceptance of every stretch mark by wearing it as a badge of honour.

    Also, it's kind of awesome having something that finally sticks out further than the boobs.

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  44. Thank you for saying this. I have been through three pregnancies as an overweight woman, never having a problem with blood pressure, gestational diabetes and my children were all 6-8 pounds. Of course, every pregnancy is different, but it's so hard to hear all of this information and not freak out a little.

    Take lots of pictures! I didn't let my husband take many photos and I really regret it now. BUt be sure to keep taking them after the baby is born. I have just a handful of pictures of me, with my children and none of me alone. I'm trying to get past the whole "I'm fat, let's not capture it for posterity thing." You look beautiful!

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  45. Kristy, just found your blog via twitter and you are so darling; I love the honesty; everyone has advice; yes, that sucks at times.

    I appreciate you sharing your truth; I just started blogging and I hope to be able to be as real as you are; I am in RL but blogging is harder arena for me; I have two babes under 4, had them both after the age of 42 ---sleeping sucks during pregnancy, and well, I have to tell you, the brain I misplaced during my first pregnancy has never been found, damn neighbors.

    :)

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  46. That is a great picture: You look like one hot mama!

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  47. You look gorgeous. Absolutely gorgeous.

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  48. And beware of the -- when you go into labor -- you're too fat to have a baby vaginally, so you're going to need an "emergency C section" don't know how you feel about the whole normal birth thing and whatever is right for you is OK -- but just know they will assume because you're a bigger gal that you can't possibly have a baby the normal way. I called my dr. an asshole and told him I was pushing and he better shut up and catch. just FYI.

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  49. Don't take more pictures yourself--get with a professional maternity photographer.
    The good ones are true artists who'll go way above and beyond anything that a non-pro with a crapcam can manage.
    Using inspired lighting and their posing/directing skills, a good one (usually women) will zero-in on your beauty and probably make someone cry with the results.
    A time like this deserves to be captured properly.
    If you find a good maternity photographer locally, treat yourself to what is sure to be a cherished portrait.

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  50. Someone sent me a link to your blog after I posted about my chronic evening barfing due to my own pregnancy. I too am overweight and pregnant and much of what you said here, I have had the exact same thoughts. Oddly enough, my doctor is much easier on me than I am on myself. He makes me feel like a normal sized pregnant woman.

    It is hard to believe that if something does go wrong that it wasn't me and my fat's fault though. I battle that thought all the time.

    They do tend to condemn the overweight crowd though - maternity clothes for the plus-sized woman is proof of that. Talk about an angry rant....

    I have yet to take a picture of my pregnant self, because, as you put it, I just feel a different kind of heavy. Now, I'm wondering if I'm just missing out. Thanks.

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  51. As an overweight pregnant woman, I've had a healthy and relatively easy pregnancy. Aches and pains, sure, but no major health scares, no morning sickness and average weight gain. The weight surprises me the most because I have not been strict with my diet and I haven't kept up with exercise very well. Best wishes on the rest of your pregnancy.

    I was also surprised when my belly exceeded my boobs. I never thought that woule be possible.

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  52. You look beautiful! I remember I couldn't wait for my belly to be bigger than my boobs. I finally looked pregnant instead of just fat. You look lovely. Enjoy this time.

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  53. It sounds like you're a natural when it comes to carrying a baby. You're so lucky! And it also sounds like your pregnancy is making you healthier - only 1 lb gained, and lower blood pressure. Wow!

    What a great post - thanks for sharing your thoughts and your awesome photos. I hope you'll share more of both!

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  54. You look adorable and HEALTHY and beautiful! I love reading your blog and think I have only commented once or twice. I feel compelled to respond to this post because we look so much alike that I think we could almost be sisters (I as the older sister!) and I had my first and only child just over 2 years ago at the age of 39.

    I was and am overweight. I was at least 60 lbs overweight when I got pregnant at 38. I had a super healthy, wonderful, easy pregnancy - just like you are experiencing. I kept waiting for that bad thing to happen because I was fat - gasp! I hiked all the way through my pregnancy - even in the hot and humid Baltimore summer. All tests and all dr's visits were totally normal. My doctor NEVER said anything about my weight other than she expected me to gain less weight (I gained about 25 lbs.)

    You WILL and ARE having a wonderful and healthy and normal pregnancy - just as your body is designed to do. We are "fed" so much junk about weight - that it is sometimes hard to remember that being overweight is not the same as being unhealthy. My son was born healthy and is now an energetic and beautiful 2 year old. Pure joy!

    Enjoy your pregnancy and your perfect, beautiful body!
    Kathleen

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  55. I weighed 270 lbs when I got pregnant and 299 when I delivered. I was in the same boat through my pregnancy. Just ignore the crap. Don't read about it, trust your body and if you must read, read about the magic of babies instead.

    I had a healthy baby girl three years ago, I now weigh 258 lbs. Still plus-sized, indeed. I'm working on that.

    Love ya with that baby in there!

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  56. I was overweight with all four of my pregnancies and never had diabetes, never had high blood pressure, never had a single problem. Three perfectly normal healthy babies (and one on the way). I actually lost weight with each pregnancy. With #1 I started at 235 and after having the baby I was 210. (I was eating the same as always, but carrying that baby around burns a lot of calories :>) With #2 I was 215 and after baby was born I was 199. #3 was about the same, #4 - we'll see, but I expect about the same too.

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  57. I gained 65 pounds with my first pregnancy and 60 with my second. I never had any health problems AND I lost the weight again. My doctor theorized that as a former eating disorder girl, my body just needed the reassurance that I would nurture this child I was carrying.

    You're body is doing such an important thing in making this baby. Enjoy it and try not to stress.

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  58. You look awesome! Listen to YOUR body, not stupid books. I am a firm believer that your body will do what it needs to do for that baby. The skinniest of people can get gestational diabetes AND high blood pressure during pregnancy.

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  59. I loved your story. I am overweight and 15 weeks pregnant, and have heard just about every horror story there is to offer, however so far, so good. I am glad there is still hope. Thank you for sharing

    sent from: fav.or.it

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  60. I totally understand what you are going through, In the last 4 years I gained nearly 100 pounds from a medication I was taking and I learned I was diabetic after the huge amount weight I gained. I had 4 kids, but I wasn't diabetic at the time. It's been 7 years since my youngest was born so being 14 weeks pregant now is very very scary, and everyday in the back of my mind I feel like something is going to go wrong, maybe I will miscarry or if I make it through the entire pregnancy my baby will be stillborn even though I manage my blood sugars tight.
    So it was comforting to know that I'm not the only person in the world who is scared of complications and worry the same as I do. I felt like it was just me!! I also feel the same way about taking pictures of myself and scared to gain weight, but I know it's natural. I want to thank you for sharing because I don't feel so alone. Thank you!!!

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  61. You are pretty amazing. I am 4 months pregnant and overweight. I found all the same things you did when I did research and I thought that my pregnancy was going to be grim...and then the first Ob/gyn I went to called me fat and told me I was going to have all these problems and that I CANNOT gain more than 10 lbs. I was like, wow...I didn't realize I was THAT overweight and that my pregnancy was going to be awful...needless to say we found a new doctor and love him...he has never made me feel bad about my weight and said that I am in perfect health to have a baby. Like you, I don't have high blood pressure or gestational diabetes... so I say screw all those books and all those skinny obsessed doctors and people out there!

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  62. You look great! Don't be ashamed!!

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  63. Thank you so much for posting this! I found you today from Googling around for plus sized pregnancy inspiration. My husband and I are considering trying to get pregnant in the coming months, but it's so difficult to be a life-long overweight person, surrounded by naturally skinny women (online and in person). Your strength is totally an inspiration (that sounds cheesy, sorry!).

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    Replies
    1. Good blog. You know that your maternity dress should be comfortable and stylish. And always choose the dress which is in larger size and comfortable fabric and it hide your weight.
      Mavi jeans

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  64. You have brought out a great post on weight problem during pregnancy

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  65. Hey there! Have you ever dealt such a situation when a person has stolen any of your intellectual property? Many thanks in advance for your reply.

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  66. I know that I'm super super behind here, but I want to thank you so so so much for posting this. I'm only 6 weeks along and have had approximately 349857 heart attacks since finding out that I'm pregnant because of all of the articles telling me how horrible I am for conceiving overweight and that there's nothing I can do about it now, so I might as well just feel awful about myself for the next 9 months, despite my normal blood pressure and no other health issues. You looked beautiful in those pictures and you really did make my entire day better! Thank you!

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  67. This is my 3rd pregnancy and I am plus size. My doctor told me she wanted me to gain no more than 20 pounds. I mean really? Like how? I'm 9 weeks now and I saw that I have already gained 5 lbs. She said she didn't want me to diet...but she wants me to watch what I eat. I'm thinking to myself that that is actually dieting. So I will have to eat 6 small meals a day. For breakfast I should have a celery stick with peanut butter. 2 hours later a cup of noodles( no salt), after that a glass of milk and a slice of lean meat, etc...
    I will try my best to watch what I eat because I know diabetes and heart disease runs in my family and I seriously want this baby to survive.

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