American Idol! Project Runway! Where Were You In The January Of My Youth!?!?!?

I remember the month of back-to-school, post-holiday winter bleakness as being dreary and cold and long and dull. And while you're in grade school, it's not like you have hot dates or wine to supplement slush-filled days. No. There was just the phone (and three-way-calling, which in my town we called "total phone" for reasons I do not understand) and nights filled with homework. And reruns.

Oh, sure, eventually NBC, CBS and ABC would re-up the television season with new episodes of the same few shows, but they were nowhere near exciting enough to compensate for the gray days of winter.

But now! Now there are hot dates AND there is wine AND there is Project Runway! And then for some crazy, Brave New World reason, perhaps because God really does love us ("us" = bloggers), who's to say, there is American Idol and Project Runway on ON THE SAME NIGHT. And I fall to my knees and delight in joy such as I have never known.

Perhaps I exaggerate. (Perhaps not.)

My point here is that this current television season is what the term "glorious" was invented for, and I would like to blog about it.

Now.

I have tried, at least three times, to keep a regularly updated (separate) blog about reality tv, with the help of some of my friends. But I have failed, because I simply cannot keep up more than one blog if I am to do anything else at all with my time, like work. Or breathe.

I also considered writing reality-tv commentary here, but failed (miserably) at that, too, because sometimes it's hard to write about with regularity.

It's hard to be brilliant and snarky and verbose on demand, even when something as rife with pop culture-y goodness as Twizzler Tits presents itself.

So I have decided - AND LO IT WAS DECREED - that, starting today, I WILL BLOG ABOUT REALITY TELEVISION SOME OF THE TIME MAYBE.

(Hey, I'm not really in the business of making decrees, so I realize mine kinda sucks. Will work on that.)

That said, I would have to say that the words, "If I were Columbo, I'd Peter Falk her" are my favorite to have ever been uttered in the history of American Idol.


Who cares if he's an improv guy? It totally worked.