But hey, it's FRIDAY. That much is certainly true.
* * *
As part of any crisis situation, my good friend Snarky's immediate reflex is to make a casserole. It's how she was raised.
Now, mind you, "crisis" may be loosely interpreted because she is female and familiar with The Crazy, et al.
me: So TheBoy and I had a long talk this weekend...
Snarky: Do I need to make a casserole?
See how that works? Neat, huh?
But then when my father died, Snarky went into overdrive.
[after bursting into tears] Ohmygod, ohmygod. Sweetie! I'm so sorry...I'm...YOU NEED A CASSEROLE! I have to make you lots of casseroles! All the casseroles! Can I come over? You don't want me over! You don't need company! Is Ish there? Soup! Maybe you need soup! Everyone loves soup! I'm worried you don't have any groceries. Are you drinking? Maybe you shouldn't be drinking. But your father...do you even HAVE any booze? OHMYGOD I'M GOING TO MAKE YOU A BOOZE CASSEROLE!
If Booze Casserole isn't the best damn thing you've ever heard in a state of shock and mourning, I don't know what is.
(note: Snarky was the one who coined the term, "Breezy Elegance." The first time I remember her using the phrase was after I described to her, over IM, from the depths of a low-carb diet, that I had somehow sprayed "crumbled" bleu cheese all over my desk and computer and keyboard in an attempt to eat said cheese with my fingers. )
Anyway, I bring this up now because just last weekend, Snarky turned up on the doorstep with a basket draped in bright colors, filled with various containers of homemade soup, condiments, and a dozen miniature bottles of liquor.
Ish looked at her and asked, "Are you some kind of angel?"
* * *
I've gotten a few notes and comments (and concerned phone calls) from you, IIFs, and my family, noting that my entries have seemed sadder lately. Asking if I'm okay.
I don't know that it's universally true (and maybe you other bloggers out there would like to chime in?) but if I'm writing about sad, hard, or emotionally charged things, it's because I am okay.
It means I've gotten to a place where I can talk about them. It means I feel like I'm on solid footing.
It does NOT mean I'm perfectly fine and, you know, auditioning to be Poster Girl For Emotional Well Being (ha!), it's just that only when I'm feeling strong can I write about the hard things.
The big truth is that my life feels sort of stable right now. Yes, I'm knocking on wood as I write this. It's a feeling I'm hardly used to, and one I don't entirely trust. I've had precious little experience living without some potentially-very-bad-thing hanging over me.
But here, now, the Fates have given me some breathing room, and I'd like to use it. I have the grounding to talk about some of the bigger, badder stuff, so I will. Because it makes me feel (even) better.
I am okay, but I'd like to be fantastic.
* * *
So! Speaking of blogging more...
Guess who's getting a total body makeover? That's right. This site!
I am working with T (and whoa, am I ever a big help!) to transform -- whoooosh! -- this blog again. The first makeover was awesome and much needed, but I'm ready for a new look.
* * *
FINALLY, because it's Friday and OHMYHOLYGOD did you KNOW ABOUT THIS?????
I'm-a go CRAZY and write it all big so you don't miss it:
Did you hear me?
ON! LINE! KAR! A! O! KEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
I am soooooooooooooooo gonna do it. (And check out the many recordings already on the site. Awful! Horrid! Awesome!)