Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Weight-Loss Update: Imma Cut My Scale

Let's just jump in here with a quick recap:

1. I start Medifast on Tuesday, March 2. I agree to try it for a month.
2. I see results immediately, and decide to stick with it. I lose about 20 pounds in the first five-six weeks.
3. By 8-10 weeks, I'm down almost 30 pounds. (Dude. Awesome.)
4. I hit a giant plateau. I don't gain, but I don't lose, in part because:
  • I have a few "off" days and nights*
  • I have gall bladder issues that eventually result in surgery (I lose 3 weeks of momentum when all is said and done)
  • My scale has an awesome sense of humor
5. We're now 15 weeks into the program -- which is still only 3.5 months -- and I have lost 34 pounds.


*IMPORTANT: While I had (and continue to have) "off" nights and "off-program" days here and there, I am still eating about a hundred times more carefully, thoughtfully and better than I was before the program.
Most incredibly, my "off" days while on the Medifast program still look like "diet" or "on-program" days when compared to how I used to consume.

That's why I'm not gaining weight.

But OMG I need to start losing again. Because I've been teetering with this same damned five pounds for over a month now, and it's time for the scale to start moving again. Before I hit someone.

Because you know? I have goals. GOALS. And they are shallow important. And they are looming.  Here are the major ones, all drawn out for me you.

 My Weight Loss & Weight Goals
As of June 15, 2010


As you can see from this very expertly drawn graph, the numbers on the right are the pounds I wish to lose. Like a reverse fundraising chart.

So yep. My overall goal is to lose 80 pounds. Which is a metric shit-ton. And a discouraging amount to think about at the beginning.  But now that I'm alllllllmost at the half-way point, it's a little less intimidating.

And lest you think that 80 pounds is too much for someone my size to lose, let me tell you: Even at 80 pounds lost, I will be considered "overweight" by bullshit standardized BMI calculators. On the other hand, I should be able to fit into single-digit jeans.

And we all know which of those is more important.

Let's look a little closer at these numbers, shall we?

a. I lose 20 pounds. 
YAY! Off to a good start. I didn't give myself a date by which I needed to hit this number, so it happened when it happened. First hunk o' chunk GONE.


b. I plateau, yet endeavor to lose 40 pounds by June 24.
This seemed a lot more reasonable when I was down 34 pounds two weeks ago. Now that I'm still at 34 pounds, I hate this stupid goal. I hate 34 pounds. I want to kick 34 pounds' ass.

But what can you do? Ish and Eve and I are heading to Tahoe for the weekend on June 24, and I wanted to hit that magic number before we left. Just because. (Well, just because the last time I was in Tahoe, Eve was 6 weeks old and I was as heavy as I've ever been in my life.)

So I'm doing what I can. I've started working out a little more. I'm trying to increase my water intake and decrease my wine intake to practically non-existent. I don't know that I can hit 40 pounds lost by next Thursday, but it will happen. And you will hear about it, boy howdy. Because...


c. 40 pounds lost by wheneverthehellithappens.
When I hit 40 pounds lost, I will be the weight I was when I arrived in San Francisco. (Who knows, I may have weighed less, but this was the number they said at my first doctor's appointment.)

Frankly, I was shocked the number was so comparatively low.

When my husband and I separated -- or, wait, no. For those of you unfamiliar with the nuances of my back story, I should phrase that differently:

When my husband left me over the phone while I was visiting my mother who had just been diagnosed with terminal cancer, and I subsequently ended up spending the rest of the summer alone in my house in the suburbs, I found myself on something of a Divorce Diet. As happens when you suddenly realize you're going to be single again. 

But I had no idea how much I weighed or how much I lost then. I just know the former was "a lot" and the latter was "whatever."

The point is, hitting this number means I will have hit a Finish Line. Which is also a Starting Line. It means I'll have undone the "damage" I've done weight/health-wise since moving to California (and, you know, having the time of my life).


d. 46 pounds. 
Important because it's 10 pounds less than where I am now. And because I've been at this weight forEVER, it seems like being 10 pounds lighter will never, ever, ever happen.

(Also, it bugs me that in my drawing, I left out the period after the d.)


e. 50 pounds by BlogHer.
I don't really care how I look at BlogHer in the sense of like, "People from the internets are going to see me! I should look my best!" That mentality is absolutely comical to me. The last several years of BlogHer saw me at my most stressed, most harried, most chubbed-out, most blemished, most crazy-eyed ever. EVER. I have no secrets from BlogHer attendees, speakers, sponsors, organizers. I could show up as a size 6 in designer clothes and $400 shoes and it wouldn't make a lick of difference. The jig is up.

But. As an arbitrary deadline, it's a good one and I think it's realistic.

More importantly, oh em eff gee. NYC in AUGUST is disgusting. It is a sauna of gross. Weighing less and being more active and healthy is going to make dealing with the sticky-yuck a thousand times easier. Especially since I'll also be chasing after a baby.



AND THERE YOU HAVE IT.

Certainly there are goals past the 50-pound mark, but that just seems so impossible and far away that I'll cross that bridge later. I have these next 15 pounds to focus on for now, and that's plenty.

15 comments:

  1. I've always found weight-loss so frustrating. Not because I couldn't do it, but because it didn't seem to make a difference to the kind of clothes I could wear. Like right now I can wear a size 4 if it's tight ONLY around my chest and has lots of billowy in the butt. But I wear a 12 in jeans. I lose weight, and nothing changes. Maybe like 1 size down in pants. That's it. That was after dropping like 30 pounds for this martial arts tournament, which btw I have jolly well packed back on after quitting MMA. But that is neither here nor there. I don't know, I guess I just wanted to express my clothing size-related outrage. Don't judge yourself if you aren't in single-digit pants, I guess is my thesis. Clothing sizes are so fucked up that there is no way you can judge your weight properly via those numbers. I'd go with whether you are happy being you, happy in your own skin, regardless of the number. Which sounds real simple and easy to do, but is a lot harder when you look in the mirror and try to actually accomplish it.

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  2. I watch this weight-loss thing of yours with a very interested eye. I think we are (or were, before you started this thing) around the same size. And we're around the same age. So I am kind of watching to see how it works for you, to see if it will work for me. Right now I am thinking when I get a job maybe I will sign up to buy the meals, because what I hate most about dieting is how much MORE I have to think about food.

    Keep fighting the good fight.

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  3. I have the exact same weight loss goal, number wise. AND when I was a size 6 (my goal size now) before I was still considered overweight. SUCK!

    I've got the exercise thing down but am still stuck around the 30lb loss mark. I think I'm gonna have to start eating better if I want to see more results. I'm at a size 14 (down from size 22). Really wanting to see that size go away.

    Keep us updated!

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  4. Well, I did the math (because I am a nerd). Losing 35 pounds in 3.5 months equals 10 pounds per month which equals Fan-effing-tastic! As you undoubtedly know, losing 1-2 pounds per week (4-8 pounds per month) is supposed to be the ideal weight loss rate. And you're doing even BETTER than that! Congratulations. Reward yourself with something wonderful and NOT food related. Woo hoo!

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  5. Congrats on what you've done so far! That's awesome! You'll make it, I just know it.
    And sidenote; August in NYC IS disgusting. UGH. I live here and have for the past 3 years and still am not used to the summers here. They are miserable. It's only the beginning of June and it's already gross! Blech.

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  6. When I lost 60lbs a couple of years ago I hit a plateau around 30lbs lost as well. The only thing that seemed to work for me was eliminating all alcohol from my diet for a month and then limiting myself to two drinks per weekend day (Friday and Saturday). Booze, even when I was accounting for the calories, seems to do a number on my metabolism... as evidenced by the 10lbs I have gained back this year when I got cocky and started meeting friends for cocktails/wine after work several nights a week.

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  7. What you have done so far is amazing! I just wanted to say that. :)

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  8. I think what you have done so far is amazing! I have been walking for about 10 days now, 10,000 or more most days and do feel better. I know you hate to walk, but everything else hurts me so that's it for me. Besides a good friend lost 40 lbs plus walking and eating better, she and you are my inspirations. A million thanks for being honest in your sharing, it is a funny read, and really helps us all deal w/the fudge around the middle. I don't know if I have lost anything as the scale at work is broken and no one has replaced the battery yet. No, I don't have one at home. Duh!

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  9. Just want you to know that I am INCREDIBLY IMPRESSED that you are already almost halfway to your goal! You are awesome!

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  10. Um ...

    "When my husband and I separated -- or, wait, no. For those of you unfamiliar with the nuances of my back story, I should phrase that differently:

    When my husband left me over the phone while I was visiting my mother who had just been diagnosed with terminal cancer, and I subsequently ended up spending the rest of the summer alone in my house in the suburbs, I found myself on something of a Divorce Diet. As happens when you suddenly realize you're going to be single again."

    HOW have I been reading your blog for awhile now and not known any of that? I was on that Divorce Diet last summer. Skinniest I've ever been in my LIFE (including teenage post-puberty years). It was the one silver lining in the whole nightmare. I've spent the past year watching the scale numbers creep back up and desperately trying to get them to go back down again.

    I've been plateaued for months, doing everything I can just to keep from GAINING, and it is truly enraging.

    Weight loss is insanely frustrating. Hang in. 36 pounds is awesome, and 40 WILL come!

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  11. I,for 12th, am beyond impressed. It must feel awesome to know you can, in fact, do this!

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  12. Probably a zillion other people will tell you this too (and it still won't make it less frustrating) but the speed at which you are losing weight is normal. 2-3 pounds a week is actually a good weight loss to strive for. I don't see how anyone could lose actual fat faster than that (water maybe). So you are actually doing GREAT.

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  13. Wow. This sounds very much like my story. I am confident that Medifast caused my gall stone. Yes, one. It was the most painful shit I have ever experienced in my life. ONE. Then I quit that shit. I am glad you had a lot of success with it so far though. You are doing awesome!

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