1-20-09

Oh sure, yesterday was all historic with its ushering in of a new era in American history and politics, an era of hope and change beginning with the swearing in of the first African American President of the United States.

But it's also the day Ish and I got married.

I know, I know. Way to make it all about us.

Actually, we thought that since there'd be plenty of t-shirts and mugs with the date already printed on them, we'd just use it. Yay for 1-20-09 bumper stickers!

Seriously, though, here's what happened:

Sometime around Thanksgiving, my head exploded.

Planning events has been a part of my job for, hell, over a decade now. It has been my full-time job for the last two years. My point is that I know what I'm doing wedding-planning-wise. I know what goes into it. I know what to be concerned about and what NOT to be concerned about. I know how to negotiate with venues and vendors, and I know what a good price is for a dinner or hors d'oeuvres or signature cocktails or specially imprinted napkins or yes, even ice sculptures, the kinds that light up and have a vodka luge. (I know! Vodka luge!)

I also know how I prefer to plan events. The first step is to start with a vision. I know that sounds obnoxious, but I'm not kidding. I need to figure out how I want the event to feel. It doesn't have to be themed ("wedding" is a pretty good theme as it is, you know?), but I have to be able to describe it, how I want the guests to experience the event.

And I couldn't get my arms around this one. Too many conflicting ideas! I take my relationship with Ish very seriously, and I would love to express my vows aloud to him in front of the people who mean the most to me. I also love to have parties. But! I am SO OVER about 90% of Official Wedding reception stuff (because I have already done it, because that's not what matters to me anymore, not because I think it's stupid). I just don't care. And also we're funny and silly and love San Francisco and would love to just serve In-and-Out Burger. EXCEPT we're ALSO fancypants sometimes. SOMETIMES we do like to incorporate more sophisticated elements into our lives. And in the end trying to describe or even figure out what I/we wanted was impossible. An orchestra! An 80s band! Vodka luge! Hot dogs! No, no, sophisticated hot dogs!

And right about the time Ish and I launched into the FOURTH heated (albeit honest to goodness) conversation about the various merits of sophisticated hot dogs, my head just shot across the room. It was too ridiculous.

It basically boiled down to the fact that we DO want to have a wedding party with vodka and hot dogs, but we DON'T want it to rule our lives, to stress us out, to take on greater importance than it should. There are bigger things to worry about right now.

We just want to be married.

We just want to have the kid.

AND we just want to have a bigass party...to celebrate it all, without the pressure of w-e-d-d-i-n-g.

We went online and made a reservation to get married on Inauguration Day, because it seemed like a damn good day to do it.

And then we debated for two more months about whether we would actually go through with it. We debated telling a few people, and inviting them to City Hall. We debated inviting just our families. We discussed telling everyone, and asking anyone who wanted to to come along. We mostly discussed not going, and doing the formal wedding thing for real.

But then a week ago, just in case, we got our rings.

And two days ago, we decided yes. Let's just do it.

We didn't tell anyone except for our two very quiet witnesses. Not anyone.

We met at City Hall right after Obama was sworn in. We filed paperwork. We met with our officiant. She asked if we had rings to exchange and we said we did. She asked if we'd like to have the ceremony in the Rotunda. We said we did.

And 30 minutes later, we were married.

* * * * * * *

We stood at the top of the Rotunda, where that person (unknown) is pictured.


Our officiant was all smiles, and had a wonderful positive energy about her. I will try and get a copy of what she said, because it was perfect.

She did speak with a heavy accent, though, so when she said something like,

...rejoice in each other's graces

it sounded to me (project much?) like she said:

...rejoice in each other's crazies.

And I thought to myself, "DONE AND DONE." And then I almost burst out laughing.

When it was over, the four of us walked down the street to Citizen Cake. It's not usually open so early (it was only about 10:30 a.m.), but there were inaugural revelers inside drinking champagne, so they let us in as well. Which meant that totally unplanned, immediately following our ceremony we got to have champagne and cake. Hurrah!

Then our witnesses left and Ish and I walked down the street and had lunch at Absinthe (and we got to see and meet Jamie, who is currently competing on Top Chef). And then we went home, and did a little work, and sat and grinned like very happy idiots.

Later that evening, we went with Ben and Emily to see their new apartment and to have more champagne, toasting to so many new beginnings.

And then Ish took me to Masa's for dinner. Which was almost as grand as a honeymoon.

All in all, I'd have to say that 1-20-09 was totally bumper-sticker worthy.




p.s. We took almost no photos, because that wasn't the point. But when we DO have that "big ass party," there will be many. I promise.