On Multitasking
If you're wondering what kind of day I had, I will tell you that I am currently sitting at my desk, stark naked, eating a popsicle.
Perhaps this is why I don't have children.
It's just that it's been so busy here at BlogHer Conference Central -- frantic busy -- that I do not have time to do things that normal people, normal people who do not work from home, do. Like wear clothes.
No, no, that's not true. I do wear clothes. But see, today at 4 p.m. I had a meeting with my personal trainer. I have no idea if the sessions are doing anything for me, because right up until I go to them and then right after them I am hermetically sealed to my chair. Sedentary. Applying calories to my midsection with wild abandon by merely existing. But this isn't the point.
The point is that my training session is the only time today I have been away from my computer for more than 62 seconds at a time.
Perhaps if my MacBook were an infant, I'd make a spectacular mother. Hmm.
And so I returned from the session wanting -- as one does -- to shower. But also MUST CHECK EMAIL because you never know who has written in the hour I've been gone. Probably I will have a dozen new emails from various Chicago representatives alerting me to the fact that my estimate is exactly, completely correct, yep, except that it's also under by 50% because I'm not from Chicago, so there's the "been to Chicago fewer than three times" tax, plus the service charge for breathing that I forgot to factor in.
"So then if I factor in this per-breath charge, it's going to cost at least...twice as much?"
"Yes that's right. Plus the cost of labor."
I really love Chicago.
ANYWAY.
So I started getting ready to shower, but checked email first. And halfway through the emails, I realized I was hungry, so I went and got a popsicle. And then on my way back to the computer remembered I was supposed to be showering, so I started disrobing.
We call this multitasking.
After a few minutes I realized I was frantically emailing with one hand and eating a popsicle with another and had managed to get all my clothes off, which meant, right.
I am crazy, yes, but! Consider:
*Answered email in a timely fashion.
*Ingested refreshing, low-caloric snack.
*Remembered to take clothes off before getting in shower.
*Blogged.
Crazy...but also effective.
And now I shower.
Ta-da!
Perhaps this is why I don't have children.
It's just that it's been so busy here at BlogHer Conference Central -- frantic busy -- that I do not have time to do things that normal people, normal people who do not work from home, do. Like wear clothes.
No, no, that's not true. I do wear clothes. But see, today at 4 p.m. I had a meeting with my personal trainer. I have no idea if the sessions are doing anything for me, because right up until I go to them and then right after them I am hermetically sealed to my chair. Sedentary. Applying calories to my midsection with wild abandon by merely existing. But this isn't the point.
The point is that my training session is the only time today I have been away from my computer for more than 62 seconds at a time.
Perhaps if my MacBook were an infant, I'd make a spectacular mother. Hmm.
And so I returned from the session wanting -- as one does -- to shower. But also MUST CHECK EMAIL because you never know who has written in the hour I've been gone. Probably I will have a dozen new emails from various Chicago representatives alerting me to the fact that my estimate is exactly, completely correct, yep, except that it's also under by 50% because I'm not from Chicago, so there's the "been to Chicago fewer than three times" tax, plus the service charge for breathing that I forgot to factor in.
"So then if I factor in this per-breath charge, it's going to cost at least...twice as much?"
"Yes that's right. Plus the cost of labor."
I really love Chicago.
ANYWAY.
So I started getting ready to shower, but checked email first. And halfway through the emails, I realized I was hungry, so I went and got a popsicle. And then on my way back to the computer remembered I was supposed to be showering, so I started disrobing.
We call this multitasking.
After a few minutes I realized I was frantically emailing with one hand and eating a popsicle with another and had managed to get all my clothes off, which meant, right.
I am crazy, yes, but! Consider:
*Answered email in a timely fashion.
*Ingested refreshing, low-caloric snack.
*Remembered to take clothes off before getting in shower.
*Blogged.
Crazy...but also effective.
And now I shower.
Ta-da!
I love multitasking. I happily work at home, and during the school year I am alone all day. Frequently work begins in my nightgown, often I become less dressed when I remember I need a shower, get out of the shower, hate to dry my hair so I work unclothed, and before my children show up I get dressed by 2. Nice plan huh?
ReplyDeleteCindi
multi-tasking for me these days consists of napping at my desk while "appearing" to work... since sleeping at home has become a thing of the past.
ReplyDeleteNot three seconds before I checked in with you this morning, I saw an ad for some parenting website, showing a man pushing his laptop on a swing. He was neither naked nor eating a popsicle, but when I arrived at your blog and read: Perhaps if my MacBook were an infant, I'd make a spectacular mother... I cracked up.
ReplyDeleteJust thought I'd share.
Have you seen "if you give a mom a cookie?" http://www.parenting.com/parenting/whitepage/magazine_pullouts/pdfs/0606_last_words.pdf
ReplyDeleteLet's hear it for the efficacy of multi-tasking! Without it, precious little would get done.
i'm thinking you need not have explained.
ReplyDeletesummertime = too frikken hot = naked
see, everyone already knows that you had a reason for sitting around nakey. my neighbors have to catch me like that all the time. i probably should care, but it is my frikken house so i jsut don't.
: )
I just love you. I do.
ReplyDelete:D
Suddenly in comparison to yours, my life seems just well...calm?
ReplyDeleteLike Ben Folds sings: I'm crazy, but I get the job done.
ReplyDeleteI'm impressed by your multi-tasking. It's now something for me to strive for.
See, all this time I thought I was just a crazy shut in. Now I know that I am a "multi tasker" !! Thanks for the boost to my self-esteem !!
ReplyDeleteThat is so something I would do...walk toward the bath, in all my glory, to get in the shower. Pass the office, see the computer, figure I'll quickly check the email...25 minutes later, I'm still sitting there,most likely reading this blog, when my honey walks in and freaks out that I'm sitting naked on his good leather office chair.
ReplyDeleteYay for multi-tasking!
Love your blog...absolutely hilarious!
ReplyDeleteI work at home (life coaching) over the phone, along with writing (or pretending to!). Anyhoo, I recently had started my coaching calls at around 7am...by 11:00am I took a break to go out and play in the garden. Came in did some more work and noticed that I had put a shirt on but still had my pj pants on. Hmmmmmmm! Way to be present!
I couldn't even remember when I put the shirt on!
So, I guess sometimes I am a multi tasker though I absolutely suck at it:)
Of course you'll make a spectacular mom. you have a sense of humor. That's about 85% of the job requirement.
ReplyDeleteit's posts like these that keep me coming back everyday. you are hilarious. and a great writer to boot. :)
ReplyDeletexo, blogging barbie
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