Hot Stuff

So my a cappella group's been having a bit of a rough time finding a loooooow alto, which means we haven't had a big performance in a while and while we're still chugging along, we're not quite moving full-speed ahead.

But do we ever have fun.

Last night, because it was two of our members' birthdays and because what the hell, it's Monday, the ladies of The Loose Interpretations and our "a cafellas" headed out to a karaoke bar instead of rehearsal.

And wow. I will tell you -- we may be a lot of things, but shy is not exactly one of them.

["a cafella" - any man closely associated with our all-female group, through marriage, dating, friendship or otherwise. Yes, it's cheesy, but if you know anything about a cappella, you know that cutesy punning comes with the territory.]

Now, before I go and display the MYRIAD pictures I took of this outing, I need to say a few things.

• One: sober people who are singing karaoke do not like to have their pictures taken. Drunken people don't seem to mind (read: notice) as much. Thus, most of my pictures are of the same folks, i.e., the people who stuck around till the wee hours. I will have to find some other way of humiliating the rest of the group later.


• Two: for some reason, the guy running the karaoke (and who I believe owns the place) hated us. H-A-T-E-D us. I don't know why. We were well behaved and polite by bar standards. We drank a lot and tipped. We could ALL sing. And there were only about five other patrons in the bar ALL NIGHT. The dozen+ of us were enthusiastic, and must have tripled their average Monday night business. So whatever. Hate away. We won't be deterred by tryrannical karaoke practices! Liberte! Egalite! Karaoke!


• Three: I um, generally try not to post about other people without their permission. I especially never post pictures of people without their permission (unless they are strangers and I don't know them). But for this? I am breaking every rule ever.

[note to my friends: Hi! Sorry! Wasn't last night fun! Nothing more to see here!]


* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

One thing that makes karaoke fun (or horrifying, or harrowing, depending on which end of the game you're on) is playing the "let's assign songs for someone else!" game. Wherein you scan the book and find something perfect for somone you know, and you write it down and put that someone's name on it and submit it to the Karaoke Tyrant. And you don't tell that someone you did it, until suddenly your name is called and you don't know why and the next thing you know you're belting GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FU-UN because what the hell.

Here we have Unidentified friend A, who looks to be happily plotting someone's death-by-Foreigner.

And what would a night of singing be without four white girls screeching: MY AN-A-CONDA DON'T! WANT! NONE! UNLESS YOU GOT! BUNS! HON!

J is one of our group's newest members, and while she looks like a perfectly normal and upstanding citizen, she's actually singing a scandalously sexy rendition of "Hot Stuff."

She is not even drunk.

S avoided being forced to the mic because of something or other called "strep throat."

I do not believe the strep impacted her enjoyment of the show, however. Or of beer.

Have you noticed (I know you have) that my photo skills have not improved? And that I don't care?

For here we have what could have been a lovely picture of Jester, except you can't tell what he looks like at all. Let's pretend this is on purpose and that I'm helping him to remain mysterious.

Oh, so you know how we are in need of a loooooow alto? Well, you can imagine our delight (*YAY*) when this lovely woman:

Got up to the mic and started singing CHER. WELL! Lisa (aka Space Alien) looked at me with her eyes wide. I looked back.

...must recruit her!

But um, the last time I tried to recruit someone at karaoke, I scared her. I think I was too enthusiastic and maybe sounded like I was trying to get new members in my cult. Lisa tried once and scared her candidate, too. (I don't know what it is with us.) So we talked S into trying this time.

And yet again, we were shot down. "I don't like to sing in front of people," was the excuse she gave.

Oh no? I thought. That's kind of funny since the only reason we're asking you is because you were SINGING IN FRONT OF US.

What? Are we not "people"? If we're cut do we not bleed? If we're handed a microphone and given an 80s ballad, do we not croon?

Maybe we just look crazy. I don't know. Moving on.

As the evening progressed, someone decided to stop in on his way home from work. I call this the "corporate karaoke" look. Very popular in Japan. And at sales conferences.

Then there was Dill.

I don't know who Dill is, or if he has a home, or what. But here is what I do know about Dill: Dill likes the karaoke bar. Dill likes to drink. Dill likes to sing. Dill likes flannel. Dill likes an audience.

And I know these things because he made them abundantly clear. And made us a little bit uncomfortable.

**The story of Dill**

This is Dill.


Dill gets into his song.


Dill notices Lisa paying attention to him.


Dill decides to sing to Lisa.


Dill decides to sing ON Lisa.


Dill retreats, which pleases Lisa. Yay! She says.


Why don't you sing for THAT guy?" Lisa suggests.


Dill complies...


...all too well.


But Dill looks just about finished, wouldn't you say?


And that was pretty much that. Although Dill returned a little later for an encore.



And now we get to the point of the post wherein I wholly embarrass my friends. Featuring the lovely couple, S&S -- the ones on the end above there, looking like maybe Dill had lost his novelty.

Anyway, this couple recently got engaged, and are both very smart, very intense, and no less so when it comes to selecting the best songs.


Awww.


(I know this one is fuzzy, but I loved how it looked like her kiss made him lose his senses.)

(mostly I think his look is saying WHY WON'T KRISTY STOP WITH THE F'ING CAMERA.)

But enough with the cute. They are also HYSTERICAL people.

Here, I am not sure what S is so emphatic about, but UNH! Whatever it is, Oh Yeah!That's right!


Here, S has just left his heart in San Francisco:


Oh yes he did:


And can I get a Woot! Woot!?


Awesome. Just, awesome.

And now we come to maybe my favorite part of this entry.

In an email dated October 3, 2006, Lisa writes:

"...I have NO idea what I was doing last night...but whatever it was I had a great time while it was going on!"

Yes, well. Lucky for her, *I* know what she was doing, and lemme tell ya. It was:

• fun to watch,

and


• even more fun to document.

Here is Lisa singing. See the blur? That is because Lisa does not sing anything without feeling.

...more feeling...

...and more...

But the best part is, she gets the feeling just listening to singing. As evidenced by her table participation.

Ahem.

And while I love this photo...

On MakeOutKate's orders (hi! miss you!), I had to save the best for last:

Happy birthday, ladies.

And congratulations, Frances!