An Idiot Without Cake: Gestational Diabetes And My "Treatment"
Please read my post below to get up to speed on my "gestational diabetes" diagnosis.
So yeah. Mad. I got mad at three things.
1. Mad at myself.
I know that every body and every pregnancy is different. I know plenty of fit, healthy women who were diagnosed with GD because that's just what happened. But I also knew it was HIGHLY likely that my I CAN EAT EVERYTHING I WANT BECAUSE I'M PREGNANT attitude and menu planning was my problem. Cake really isn't a food group.
When I started to think about it, all of the "it's worse the second time" hormonal things I was talking about earlier? ALL of them can be attributed to too much sugar. Weird mood and body fluctuations? Crazy energy surges and crashes? Wacked-out sleep and dream patterns, beyond "normal" pregnancy wacked-out-ed-ness? Sugar, sugar, sugar.
Duh.
2. Mad at the diagnosis.
As I have repeatedly stated, I am not a medical professional AND every body is different. But precisely because every body is different, I think that calling it "gestational diabetes" is alarmist and terrifying and not quite true across the board.
Some people can't attribute GD to diet alone or at all. Some women -- say, those with a genetic predisposition to diabetes -- can change their diet and exercise routine completely and still need medication.
However. If I have no history of this, no predisposition to it in any way, AND my blood sugar levels go back to "normal" two days after I stop shoveling high-fructose corn syrup into my mouth, then I feel like my "case" of this "condition" is maybe not as dire as one would think given what it's called. You know?
3. Mad at the treatment.
OMFG. The moment the nurse told me I would be contacted by a "center" who "does counseling" for "diabetics" I knew I was in for it. There is a state-run program (UGH!) and I would be enrolled and, the nurse said, they will help me understand how to monitor my blood sugar (great!) and -- the words I never, ever, ever want to hear ever --
to keep my blood sugar in check.
Can you hear me rolling my eyes?
Yes, of course I'd GO to the session. I'm not totally negligent and irresponsible.
I am, however, a nutritionist's worst nightmare. I am smart and well educated and extremely knowledgeable about food, diet, and nutrition. KNOWING what I should do has never been my problem. DOING it? Well, right.
I tried to put on my best face, my best sense of humor, my best attitude and attend my one-on-one session as bravely as possible. I decided before I arrived that I would just be honest with my counselor. I would tell her that I understand my diagnosis, I am certain I know how it happened AND I am certain I can get it and keep it under control. I would not be rude or snarky or sarcastic, I would be open and tell her that I'm feeling stupid and silly. I hoped for the best.
The best did not happen.
The counseling program is, as I mentioned, state-run. Which means, if you think about it, the educational materials they provide have to be accessible to everyone. NOT UNLIKE THE DMV HANDBOOK. No big words. Friendly, cartoon drawings. Easy-to-fill-in charts. Ridiculous, condescending program title intended to make you feel happy about what you're doing.
The program is called "Sweet Success." Yes, really.
Sure, I understand why the program is designed this way. You understand why the program is designed this way. But still, I wanted to believe that I would not feel scolded or condescended to. I wanted to believe that my counselor would treat me like a knowledgeable human and perhaps customize my session.
No.
I tried. I tried to break the ice by being exceedingly pleasant and chipper. I was honest from the get-go, telling her that weight management, nutrition, and all that goes with it is something I am very familiar with. I told her this session would be hard for me because I know better.
Deaf. Ears. No acknowledgment whatsoever.
She went through her spiel. She walked me through how to use the blood sugar monitoring kit.
I made the mistake of suggesting that there might be an app that keeps track of my results, and she replied as though I had asked to taste her shoe. No, I can't use an app, I need to use a pen and The Book because that's the only way I can show her and my doctor my readings at all future appointments. Oh, good.
We took a sample right there. My level was perfectly within the range she gave me (81 for those of you keeping score), a mere day-and-a-half after I was told of my diagnosis and started regulating my diet all by myself.
She asked me all the background questions, and I was happy to answer -- as though I was proving my own point. No, there is zero history of diabetes in my family. No, I did not have GD with my first pregnancy. No, my levels were not abnormal earlier in this pregnancy. No, I have not gained an excessive amount of weight this pregnancy. Etcetera.
STILL. I was as fine and as chipper about the opening spiel and blood-sugar monitoring part and the background questions as humanly possible. But when she got out The Book, I balked. It was gonna get ugly.
Here is where you will keep track of everything you eat, she said.
For some reason, I was unprepared for this. "Guidelines," yes. "Writing down everything I eat," no. The book had a cartoon drawing of happy babies on the front and everything. Like maybe I should color them in with magic markers.
But suddenly and dramatically and I was on a diet. A full-scale, share-every-move-you-make, medically required DIET. I went from feeling foolish to feeling punished. I almost burst into tears, but fought to keep them back. I just let her recite her lines and point at things in the book.
I didn't want to do it. I wasn't going to do it if I didn't have to. Did I have to?
She said: We need you to write everything down, including portion size and brand, and you have to be as specific as possible. We do this so that if your numbers go up, we can figure out why.
And THAT, my friends, is where I lost it. Civilly, mind you. But I was emotionally drained and annoyed and feeling chastised.
I blurted out, "You don't think I could figure that out myself?"
She was taken aback. "I'm sorry?" she asked.
I repeated myself. "I just...I feel like I should be able to figure it out myself...?"
I could have phrased it better (or not at all) but that's exactly what was at the heart of my issue. This blood sugar thing is NOT a mystery to me. I get it.
Said another way: Let's forget about the whole world of possibilities right now and focus on the reality that is my personal situation. I am not a statistic, I am a human being sitting right in front of you, telling you the truth about myself. ALL signs point to my condition being a direct result of my carb-heavy diet. If I cut back on my sugar and my numbers immediately go down -- which is exactly what's happened -- isn't it safe to say that we have a very good idea of how to proceed?
Based on everything I've told you today, don't you think I might have a slight handle on what's happening with my body? Maybe possibly?
No? No. That isn't how it works. They have to be careful. They have to be sure they're not missing something. I know. But right then, I didn't care. I am not a cog and I didn't want to feel like one.
The counselor was clearly affronted by myinsubordination question. I had asked a snotty question in a snotty way, and she was horrified. It took her a few seconds to compose herself. When she got it together, she stammered out that she is trained and that it's possible she can see stuff I could miss.
And while that makes complete sense? Meh.
THEN? She got out the food pyramid and it was like we were downward spiraling.
Snippet of continued conversation
Her: ...snacks, like any of the light yogurts.
Me: Oh, but aren't most of the light yogurts full of high-fructose corn syrup?
Her: Not the light ones.
Me: Actually, I'm pretty sure they are...
And then she changed the subject immediately and tactlessly. P.S. I'm right.
Same with the conversation I tried to initiate around the "nutritional" value of:
Telling me about crazy, processed sugar-free foods I should feel fine eating suggests to me we are not taking a holistic approach to my overall well-being.
But when I thought it couldn't possibly get any worse, she actually pulled out a piece of paper with a sample food label.
"Do you know how to read a nutrition label?" She asked me.
"Yes." I replied.
She walked me through it anyway (why did she ask?), taking pains to go over the highlighted parts. See, total Carbohydrates is PER serving size...
Then she ended the session 30 minutes early. Spiel or no spiel, she could not get me out of her office fast enough.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
When I first got my diagnosis I felt ashamed. Then angry. Then enraged, immediately following my counseling session.
Then I figured out how to make this whole thing work for me.
I have been taking my measurements religiously. In the 1.5 weeks since my diagnosis, my numbers have been totally normal. I had a couple blips that I adjusted for and corrected immediately (ex: half a grapefruit sent my numbers high; steamed sweet potatoes didn't). I have not been tracking every single thing I eat, unless there's something funky.
I have cut my carbs significantly. My new "indulgence" is fake ice cream bars (yay, chemicals!). I never exceed the amount of carbs per meal that my counselor advised (which, to be fair, compared to doing Atkins is like a PARTY). I snack more frequently (I'm really bad about eating regularly, which I learned.)
I've lost 7 stupid pounds.
Meaning I've gained a whopping total of 15 pounds this pregnancy. With only 9 weeks to go.
Resolved, I called my doctor's office and asked if the Sweet Success program was mandatory. The nurse I spoke with said it wasn't, but asked why I wasn't interested in continuing it. I explained -- again, as politely as I could muster -- that I feel very confident that I know why my numbers were high, how to correct them, and that I HAVE corrected them.
She replied by telling me why my numbers might be high. Um, but...?
She told me that if I don't get my numbers under control (BUT THEY ARE), I might need to be medicated...?
I repeated that my numbers are fine, and have been since I got my diagnosis.
Is it that no one believes me? Are they just trained to be skeptical? While I get that they need to emphasize the seriousness of the condition, I also wish someone would actually just listen to me.
If I'd thought about it for 3 seconds, I could have curbed my carb intake two days before my test and not been subjected to ANY of this. I'm actually glad I'm checking my blood sugar (it's fascinating!), but otherwise, this is all so frustrating.
I'm supposed to bring my test kit with me to my next doctor's appointment to show him all my numbers and to discuss how to proceed. My guess is that he will be like, "Oh, yeah. You're fine."
I'll keep you posted.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Serving Size: 16 pieces
Servings Per Container: about 3*
Calories: 140
Total Fat: 0g
Sodium: 25g
Total Carbohydrate: 36g
Sugars: 25g
Protein: 0g
*Hahahahahahaha!
So yeah. Mad. I got mad at three things.
1. Mad at myself.
I know that every body and every pregnancy is different. I know plenty of fit, healthy women who were diagnosed with GD because that's just what happened. But I also knew it was HIGHLY likely that my I CAN EAT EVERYTHING I WANT BECAUSE I'M PREGNANT attitude and menu planning was my problem. Cake really isn't a food group.
When I started to think about it, all of the "it's worse the second time" hormonal things I was talking about earlier? ALL of them can be attributed to too much sugar. Weird mood and body fluctuations? Crazy energy surges and crashes? Wacked-out sleep and dream patterns, beyond "normal" pregnancy wacked-out-ed-ness? Sugar, sugar, sugar.
Duh.
2. Mad at the diagnosis.
As I have repeatedly stated, I am not a medical professional AND every body is different. But precisely because every body is different, I think that calling it "gestational diabetes" is alarmist and terrifying and not quite true across the board.
Some people can't attribute GD to diet alone or at all. Some women -- say, those with a genetic predisposition to diabetes -- can change their diet and exercise routine completely and still need medication.
However. If I have no history of this, no predisposition to it in any way, AND my blood sugar levels go back to "normal" two days after I stop shoveling high-fructose corn syrup into my mouth, then I feel like my "case" of this "condition" is maybe not as dire as one would think given what it's called. You know?
3. Mad at the treatment.
OMFG. The moment the nurse told me I would be contacted by a "center" who "does counseling" for "diabetics" I knew I was in for it. There is a state-run program (UGH!) and I would be enrolled and, the nurse said, they will help me understand how to monitor my blood sugar (great!) and -- the words I never, ever, ever want to hear ever --
adjust my diet
to keep my blood sugar in check.
Can you hear me rolling my eyes?
Yes, of course I'd GO to the session. I'm not totally negligent and irresponsible.
I am, however, a nutritionist's worst nightmare. I am smart and well educated and extremely knowledgeable about food, diet, and nutrition. KNOWING what I should do has never been my problem. DOING it? Well, right.
I tried to put on my best face, my best sense of humor, my best attitude and attend my one-on-one session as bravely as possible. I decided before I arrived that I would just be honest with my counselor. I would tell her that I understand my diagnosis, I am certain I know how it happened AND I am certain I can get it and keep it under control. I would not be rude or snarky or sarcastic, I would be open and tell her that I'm feeling stupid and silly. I hoped for the best.
The best did not happen.
The counseling program is, as I mentioned, state-run. Which means, if you think about it, the educational materials they provide have to be accessible to everyone. NOT UNLIKE THE DMV HANDBOOK. No big words. Friendly, cartoon drawings. Easy-to-fill-in charts. Ridiculous, condescending program title intended to make you feel happy about what you're doing.
This is an actual illustration on the materials I was given. I think the woman is smiling because she doesn't actually have gestational diabetes, unlike me, THE CARB WHORE.
Don't you love that they tell you what "gestational" means?
Don't you love that they tell you what "gestational" means?
The program is called "Sweet Success." Yes, really.
Sure, I understand why the program is designed this way. You understand why the program is designed this way. But still, I wanted to believe that I would not feel scolded or condescended to. I wanted to believe that my counselor would treat me like a knowledgeable human and perhaps customize my session.
No.
I tried. I tried to break the ice by being exceedingly pleasant and chipper. I was honest from the get-go, telling her that weight management, nutrition, and all that goes with it is something I am very familiar with. I told her this session would be hard for me because I know better.
Deaf. Ears. No acknowledgment whatsoever.
She went through her spiel. She walked me through how to use the blood sugar monitoring kit.
I made the mistake of suggesting that there might be an app that keeps track of my results, and she replied as though I had asked to taste her shoe. No, I can't use an app, I need to use a pen and The Book because that's the only way I can show her and my doctor my readings at all future appointments. Oh, good.
We took a sample right there. My level was perfectly within the range she gave me (81 for those of you keeping score), a mere day-and-a-half after I was told of my diagnosis and started regulating my diet all by myself.
She asked me all the background questions, and I was happy to answer -- as though I was proving my own point. No, there is zero history of diabetes in my family. No, I did not have GD with my first pregnancy. No, my levels were not abnormal earlier in this pregnancy. No, I have not gained an excessive amount of weight this pregnancy. Etcetera.
SIDEBAR!
A few years ago, my online bank account got broken into. I had about $6,000 stolen from me and transferred to an unlinked account in the Middle East. I didn't know it had happened right away, and I learned about it when the bank notified me. I spoke to a private investigator for the bank, and he assured me they'd have it taken care of. However! The only way to get my money back was to call their fraud department separately and go through their standard process.
Unfortunately -- and somewhat hysterically, actually -- their standard process involved asking me 900 questions about why I "suspected" I'd had my account broken into.
Have you recently given your PIN to anyone? No.
Have you recently used your ATM card in a public place where someone may have seen you? No.
Have you lost your debit or ATM card recently? No.
Why do you suspect that your account has been broken into? BECAUSE YOU CALLED ME TO TELL ME MY ACCOUNT WAS BROKEN INTO.
That's exactly what my counseling session felt like. We were trying to figure out why my numbers were high, except I knew why and stated why. We were trying to figure out how to get my numbers back under control, except they already were.
STILL. I was as fine and as chipper about the opening spiel and blood-sugar monitoring part and the background questions as humanly possible. But when she got out The Book, I balked. It was gonna get ugly.
Here is where you will keep track of everything you eat, she said.
For some reason, I was unprepared for this. "Guidelines," yes. "Writing down everything I eat," no. The book had a cartoon drawing of happy babies on the front and everything. Like maybe I should color them in with magic markers.
But suddenly and dramatically and I was on a diet. A full-scale, share-every-move-you-make, medically required DIET. I went from feeling foolish to feeling punished. I almost burst into tears, but fought to keep them back. I just let her recite her lines and point at things in the book.
I didn't want to do it. I wasn't going to do it if I didn't have to. Did I have to?
She said: We need you to write everything down, including portion size and brand, and you have to be as specific as possible. We do this so that if your numbers go up, we can figure out why.
And THAT, my friends, is where I lost it. Civilly, mind you. But I was emotionally drained and annoyed and feeling chastised.
I blurted out, "You don't think I could figure that out myself?"
She was taken aback. "I'm sorry?" she asked.
I repeated myself. "I just...I feel like I should be able to figure it out myself...?"
I could have phrased it better (or not at all) but that's exactly what was at the heart of my issue. This blood sugar thing is NOT a mystery to me. I get it.
Said another way: Let's forget about the whole world of possibilities right now and focus on the reality that is my personal situation. I am not a statistic, I am a human being sitting right in front of you, telling you the truth about myself. ALL signs point to my condition being a direct result of my carb-heavy diet. If I cut back on my sugar and my numbers immediately go down -- which is exactly what's happened -- isn't it safe to say that we have a very good idea of how to proceed?
Based on everything I've told you today, don't you think I might have a slight handle on what's happening with my body? Maybe possibly?
No? No. That isn't how it works. They have to be careful. They have to be sure they're not missing something. I know. But right then, I didn't care. I am not a cog and I didn't want to feel like one.
The counselor was clearly affronted by my
And while that makes complete sense? Meh.
THEN? She got out the food pyramid and it was like we were downward spiraling.
Sour Patch Kids are not on this pyramid ANYWHERE!
(click for larger; this is the actual doc I was given)
(click for larger; this is the actual doc I was given)
Snippet of continued conversation
Her: ...snacks, like any of the light yogurts.
Me: Oh, but aren't most of the light yogurts full of high-fructose corn syrup?
Her: Not the light ones.
Me: Actually, I'm pretty sure they are...
And then she changed the subject immediately and tactlessly. P.S. I'm right.
Same with the conversation I tried to initiate around the "nutritional" value of:
- The crap they put in diet soda
- How artificial sweeteners trick your body into craving more, just like sugar
- How some artificial sweeteners have been shown have a similar reaction to sugar on the glycemic index
Telling me about crazy, processed sugar-free foods I should feel fine eating suggests to me we are not taking a holistic approach to my overall well-being.
But when I thought it couldn't possibly get any worse, she actually pulled out a piece of paper with a sample food label.
"Do you know how to read a nutrition label?" She asked me.
"Yes." I replied.
She walked me through it anyway (why did she ask?), taking pains to go over the highlighted parts. See, total Carbohydrates is PER serving size...
Then she ended the session 30 minutes early. Spiel or no spiel, she could not get me out of her office fast enough.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
When I first got my diagnosis I felt ashamed. Then angry. Then enraged, immediately following my counseling session.
Then I figured out how to make this whole thing work for me.
I have been taking my measurements religiously. In the 1.5 weeks since my diagnosis, my numbers have been totally normal. I had a couple blips that I adjusted for and corrected immediately (ex: half a grapefruit sent my numbers high; steamed sweet potatoes didn't). I have not been tracking every single thing I eat, unless there's something funky.
I have cut my carbs significantly. My new "indulgence" is fake ice cream bars (yay, chemicals!). I never exceed the amount of carbs per meal that my counselor advised (which, to be fair, compared to doing Atkins is like a PARTY). I snack more frequently (I'm really bad about eating regularly, which I learned.)
I've lost 7 stupid pounds.
Meaning I've gained a whopping total of 15 pounds this pregnancy. With only 9 weeks to go.
Resolved, I called my doctor's office and asked if the Sweet Success program was mandatory. The nurse I spoke with said it wasn't, but asked why I wasn't interested in continuing it. I explained -- again, as politely as I could muster -- that I feel very confident that I know why my numbers were high, how to correct them, and that I HAVE corrected them.
She replied by telling me why my numbers might be high. Um, but...?
She told me that if I don't get my numbers under control (BUT THEY ARE), I might need to be medicated...?
I repeated that my numbers are fine, and have been since I got my diagnosis.
Is it that no one believes me? Are they just trained to be skeptical? While I get that they need to emphasize the seriousness of the condition, I also wish someone would actually just listen to me.
If I'd thought about it for 3 seconds, I could have curbed my carb intake two days before my test and not been subjected to ANY of this. I'm actually glad I'm checking my blood sugar (it's fascinating!), but otherwise, this is all so frustrating.
I'm supposed to bring my test kit with me to my next doctor's appointment to show him all my numbers and to discuss how to proceed. My guess is that he will be like, "Oh, yeah. You're fine."
I'll keep you posted.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Serving Size: 16 pieces
Servings Per Container: about 3*
Calories: 140
Total Fat: 0g
Sodium: 25g
Total Carbohydrate: 36g
Sugars: 25g
Protein: 0g
*Hahahahahahaha!
I suppose they think you might be cleverly pretending to know what you're talking about... I mean, are you a doctor? Well then.
ReplyDelete... um, that was my sarcastic voice. Did I mention that?
Reading this made me livid at the way the nutritionist treated you!! You're doing a great job and shouldn't be made to feel ashamed. Sending you a hug.
ReplyDeleteI know why medical professionals assume the generally population is full of idiots, but when confronted by rational and intelligent people that seem to know their shit, you'd think they would dial it back a bit. They don't, and this frustrates me to no end.
ReplyDeleteI hope things get easier for you, and that somebody, soon, invents carb free sour patch kids!
So, one thing I learned about the GD test: don't eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich after you finish that nasty orangey drink. No matter how bad you want to get the taste out of your mouth. I was in the same boat as you (eating every carb in sight, the sweeter the better) until the results from the non-fasting glucose test came back. In the week it took to get in to the doctors to take the 3 hour glucose I panicked. I radically changed my diet, started using mynetdiary.com to log my food and lost 7lbs in a week. I was feeling all of those things: I've ruined my baby, of course I have this because I'm overweight, I failed at being pregnant...of course. When the test came back normal I thought I was in the clear. My midwives said GD is not a big deal and I could still have this baby at home if I wanted to...until I developed preeclampsia. If given a choice between the two, give me GD any day. (My 3 month old and I are fine. All that beating myself up only made me miserable, but didn't change a thing.)
ReplyDeleteBTW: Its not just state run programs that think you're a moron. The nutritionist I was sent to treated me the same way. Maybe they assume that pregnancy brain has the same result as a lobotomy? Good for your for getting out of that nonsense.
Well told. I'm all frustrated for you.
ReplyDeleteIt's sad that they treated you that way. Obviously you were being honest and explained your situation. Unfortunately doctors/nurse and the like are faced with liars and idiots so often they just treat everyone this way.
ReplyDeleteI've had the same thing happen countless times. All you can do is go in and show the doctor your numbers and tell him straight out that you indulged a little too often in sugar and now that you've stopped everything is fine.
You pretty much have to treat the doctor like an idiot and spell it out to him/her.
Good luck.
What is frustrating about this situation is the double sided conversation. One one side "You are responsible for your own health" is a conversation I've heard. On the other side "You need to do what I say" even if you don't agree with my miscellaneous, random test.
ReplyDeleteI've learned that doctors fear lawsuits so much that they will try to twist your arm into doing whatever they want. (Actually said to me by a former doctor.) Regardless of how ridiculous or how much evidence to the contrary.
When I took my paperwork to my new, wonderful doctor he laughed out loud. He said all the numbers were off because the lab work went in with me mistakenly listed as a male.
Instead of a rational conversation where we could explore why the numbers seemed so out of whack, I was told that my voice meant little. That's when I decided that no one knew me better than I did. They are my advisors, (and here is where I sound 5) but they can't tell me what to do.
that was like a flashback for me...
ReplyDeleteand I AM medically trained... I also think I DID cry when the stupid nutritionist cow left the room for a minute to grab something- it would have been worse if my husband wasn't there.
I hate that they treated you that way- I hate that even uneducated people get treated that way- just because someone has GD doesn't mean they are a moron (and even if they are a moron, that doesn't mean they should be treated like crap!)
I have to say I totally agree with one of the previous posters- "they are my advisors... but they can't tell me what to do".
You know yourself, and your body. Kudos for not taking their crap!
Your doc (or the practice) might be getting state money for every woman the office signs up for this program. If that's the case, there might be a lot of resistance to your desire to not play along. Ugh. Good luck.
ReplyDeleteThat counseling session was ridiculous! I was one point over on two of my three blood draws on the three-hour test, so they diagnosed me. Nevermind that they kept testing 15 minutes before an hour had passed. I went to the counseling session - which in our area was only held by a private hospital, which they charged an arm and a leg for which my insurance wouldn't cover totally. The counselor was nice but she asked me to do all of these things and fax her my numbers once a week. At the end of the first week I faxed her my numbers and a couple of clarifying questions. NEVER HEARD FROM HER. Second week, faxed numbers, questions. NEVER HEARD FROM HER. I didn't bother again. Was supposed to call her after my pregnancy to confirm my GD was gone. Never did. Never heard from her. I never had stick where my blood sugar was wonky. I gained less than 20 pounds the whole pregnancy. Bah. I feel your pain.
ReplyDeleteFollow your instincts, ignore the nurse and the nutritionist. They can't make you do anything differently than you are doing. If they insist they can, just smile and nod at everything they ask, leave the office and continue how you are, when you go back say, with a smile, "Oh, I guess I forgot to fill out the book, how are my numbers?" and when they say "normal" just smile again.
ReplyDeleteAnd actually, if your doctor is good, just flat out tell him/her you aren't going back and chances are s/he will say OK and then you can say that to the peripheral medical people "My doctor said I don't need to any more" - no one can argue with that.
I went through almost this exact same scenario with my second pregnancy, too (and at the time I was an RN) and I got my own numbers under control but they still didn't trust me. But my doc did, and I knew, and that's all that mattered.
Good luck!
I am really fixated on the part about the yogurt and the high-fructose corn syrup. It just reminded me of all of the doctors/medical professionals I have been to, who not only treated me like a moron despite evidence to the contrary but also argued with me about facts. Facts!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with this very annoying situation. I have faith that you will take charge of your own health competently. I admire that you are sharing this so that other people can benefit from the information!
My my, aren't you a clever rebel?
ReplyDeleteI was laughing so hard while reading this - I feel for you, and I know WHAT BRAND OF YOGURT to which you refer (the mere sight of it offends me). I have a sneaking suspicion you will be fine. The Sweet Success counselor, however? Is already planning her next illness to coincide with your next appointment.
A side bar: Recently had a test at a lab where I had to drink something in between tests. 'It's just like the glucose tolerance test but margarita flavored!' they assured me.
I chugged it and made a horrible face. 'O M G LIES, LIES!! THAT DOES NOT TASTE ANYTHING LIKE A MARGARITA!' and then....'Wait. Shit. There's no aspartame in here, is there?'
Why yes, turns out there was as much as 2 cans of soda would have...problem is I am allergic to aspartame. So they told me it was 'like the glucose test' which is FULL OF SUGAR and handed me aspartame. I in turn, handed them an allergic reaction and much vomiting. They learned to ask people about allergies before handing them anything to ingest.
I say, as long as you've gotten your numbers under control and are able to test and connect high numbers to things you've eaten (ie your sweet potato v. half a grapefruit) then you're doing just fine. Of course, I'm not a doctor, so there you go. Gosh, but I am frustrated for you. I hope your doctor is at least nice and reasonable.
ReplyDeleteOn the other hand, who can resist the sour patch kids? NO ONE. Unless they're orange flavored. If my sister is around, I still give her all of my orange ones.
You'll be just fine!
It sounds like you are doing everything right. I had GD with my second baby and at the time, I was at a teaching hospital in the downtown area of a pretty big city. I was treated like a moron (bad) but given a free blood sugar monitor (good). My doctor WAS really cool about it, he never asked to look at my book (with my blood sugar, I never had to write down what I ate - or if I was asked to, I probably laughed and forgot). He just asked me how it was, particularly the morning blood sugar (the most important and telling one, as you no doubt know). One time, though, I saw a NP because he was out sick and she asked for my meter - apparently you can see the readouts for the last several blood sugar checks. I told her I didn't have it, I never brought it and she said "he just BELIEVES you?". I said, well, I'm older than he is, so maybe he just trusts me. I'm older than YOU, too, I told her. Sheesh.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was pregnant with my third, I was 'borderline' on the one hour test and I just went ahead and did the blood sugar checking without doing the three hour, because at that point I had two little kids and I did NOT have three hours to sit around drinking that damned soda.
The thing that helped me the most was to exercise and especially lift weights. I had bad round ligament pain but it was bad whether or not I exercised, so I got in the habit of doing it and it really helped. It also made me feel a little more empowered - like even if I *had* gotten myself into this situation, even though I knew better, at least I could get myself out. I was really worried about every high blood sugar because I do NOT want to get diabetes later on just because I effed around when I was pregnant.
So anyways, I've been there and it sucks but it sounds like you are appropriately mad - I hope when you tell your doctor, who knows YOU, it will go well. Good luck!
I'm sorry, but I had to snicker at calling the doctor's office to ask if the program was mandatory.
ReplyDelete"Yes, I'm sorry, but it is. You may NOT give birth until you've successfully completed this program."
My experience in this sort of situation has taught me - talk to the doctor. Not the receptionist, not the nurse. The DOCTOR. He's (am assuming it's a "he" - mine was) he's the one who makes the judgment calls - everyone else follows procedure.
If a state-sponsored health program looks like this, is there any reason to believe that all federally-sponsored health care might just be run this way, if that happens? I don't want going to the doctor to be like going to the DMV! One-size fits none. Also, I would looooove to compare the sugar amounts from sour patch kids to the sugar amounts in a serving of state-recommended *brand* yogurt! I would eat the sour patches any day. If you're going to eat chemicals, you might as well enjoy them!!
ReplyDeleteMy suggestion -- which someone already mentioned -- was to talk to your doctor about this. Like a previous commenter said, the receptionist, the nurses, everyone who is not your doctor, all have to follow protocol.
ReplyDeleteIf you get that kind of run-around from your doctor, then RUN! Find a new doctor that will listen to you and not talk down to you. I'm so glad mine is that way; he respects me and while I think sometimes he's a bit old-fashioned in his advice, he knows that I'm as well-educated as he is (I just have different degrees).
I think my reaction would have been the same as yours. I would probably have interrupted the diet counselor and told her not to waste my time and please stop being so condescending, that I already told her I understood this. But then I'm not very tactful. :p
If the diet counselor continued to talk down to you because "everybody lies" and says things are OK and they know what they're doing, that's BS. Lying and saying "everything is OK" is NOT the same thing as speaking intelligently about the subject. While it isn't always easy to detect liars, it shouldn't be that hard to detect when someone is well-read on the subject. Sounds like the so-called diet counselor doesn't know as much as she thinks she does. Harumph!
What is everyone so enraged about? I get that Kristy was frustrated, but I haven't heard anything that makes the nutritionist sound so awful. (Yet.)
ReplyDeleteAlso...Kristy...I have one gentle thing to add. I don't want to make you feel bad and I'm sorry if this is an unwanted comment. (I guess you can choose not to post it though!) But at some point this year I saw a picture of Eve eating chocolate chip pancakes at home. Are you okay with passing that same sweet tooth along to her? I am an overweight mama, too, and I'm trying to avoid sugar with my 14-month old, because I don't want him to want something I know isn't good for him. In a few years, I'll have to deal with McDonalds and birthday cakes (which he'll have, I know) but while he's a baby, I'm keeping him on whole foods. My 2 cents. Sorry to be a pain.
Thanks for all the support and solidarity! I do see a need for a couple follow-up posts for sure.
ReplyDeleteFor one thing, I don't think the nutritionist was horrible, I think the entire set-up is horrible. (I think on a personal level, the counselor has some serious issues - like OCD.) Some folks are counselors because they want to help people. Others fall into those types of roles to be "in charge" of other people. I strongly believe this woman falls into the latter category.
To the last point that Anon 12:57 made, I know you're trying to be helpful, but you have to understand a few things:
1. I have never eaten anything with abandon. Even when I eat poorly, I rationalize it. I have never not been cognizant of my eating anything. I have never just put something in my mouth without calculating its effects.
2. This also makes me 100% aware of what Eve eats every single second of every single day. I am EXTREMELY conscientious of her food "choices."
The truth is that I am FAR less concerned with "passing on my sweet tooth" (which I don't actually have; sugar cravings seem pregnancy-specific) than I am of passing on deep-seated fear of (and guilt towards) eating something delightful once in a while.
But this is great blog fodder. :)
You're doing just fine! I hope that you can relax and enjoy the last part of your pregnancy. Blessings to you.
ReplyDeleteCorie
I think that your (understandable) reaction to this nutritionist and her "song and dance" could also come from a lifetime of dealing with all of the stress, worry and unfounded guilt that comes with struggling with maintaining a healthy weight. After all, isn't that struggle what actually started this blog? And, aren't you still mightily fighting the good fight with regard to your weight? I would have totally been hurting having to hear this ridiculous oversimplified approach as though you did not grasp the concept of healthy diet/eating--when in fact, you've spent a lifetime learning all there is to learn about this topic. I am sorry this happened, and wish you the best of health!
ReplyDeleteIn my job there's a lot of meetings and mediation with highly intelligent people; professionals (doctors, lawyers, etc.) --- I'm going to start using cartoon drawings to help drive home the point that I am WAY smarter than they will ever be and that they could never understand such difficult subject matter. I bet they'll just love me!
ReplyDeleteOh. And also, this is reminiscent of that show on MTV called Boiling Point where you get money if you don't lose your cool when they're getting incredibly ridiculous. Except, I'm sorry there was no money.
ReplyDeleteI can totally relate to knowing how to eat right but not doing so well on the actual putting that knowledge into action. I work out with a personal trainer twice a week and we've had many discussions about this. He can NOT understand how I can know the proper thing to eat and then still have grilled chicken salad for dinner followed up by fudge. Good luck sticking to eating right!
ReplyDeleteI don't know how you kept any sort of cool in that session. Just remember that every graduating class of degreed, certified professionals has people at the bottom. And sending a fool to college can merely mean you now have an educated fool to deal with. Anyhoo, they're not the boss of you. None of them. You're doing an awesome job.
ReplyDeleteOne thing I loved about going to a birth center with midwifes is that they had me weigh myself and do my own urine test (isn't that a sugar one?) and trusted me to tell them the true results. Imagine- trust between the women who are going to deliver my baby and me.
ReplyDeleteO. M. F. I don't think I could have lasted and entire half hour. I think I might have faked a seizure to get out of there.
ReplyDeleteThe problem is the well-documented history of people not being able to control their blood sugar and needing to be led through the paces like a pony on a rope.
You are not a pony, but the "system" doesn't adapt to you. They just can't deal with any intelligence coming back at them. Which you discovered.
I'm sorry you went through that, truly. In other words: What a fucking bitch she was.
Ay yai yai! Brutal.
ReplyDeleteThe light yogurt thing is the most infuriating to me, too--I mean, of course it sucks that she wouldn't adapt to you, but to recommend something full of HCFS? FAIL!
(Can you send her a photo of the label to prove you're right?)
Best wishes. Criminy. ;p
i've run across many medical professionals over the years who've NOT LISTENED TO ME or believed me when i try to tell them i know my body, i know what's normal for me and what's not normal...
ReplyDeleteit's pervasive in medicine, especially for female patients. it's infuriating.
You are not the only one frustrated. My first kid weighed in at a whopping 10 pounds 9 oz. After delivery my doctor kept apologizing because he failed me by not diagnosing me with gestational diabetes. I thought he was NUTS. Second pregnancy I had to take the effing glucose test every 4 weeks. Guess what? NO EFFING GD! Apparently I just grow them big. But also, with the first pregnancy I ate an entire pie every night, not quite but almost. So, first one was big and second one with less pie smaller (only 9 pounds, but a girl not a boy like my first).
ReplyDeleteHopefully you will have an uneventful last few weeks.
WOW! That's alot to go through. Keep on doing what you are doing and tell the sweet program to kiss it! Hope everything for the next 8 weeks goes smoothly.....
ReplyDeleteHey how are you doing? I hope well.
ReplyDeleteOMG Kristy, when I got pregnant with Nikolas at 39 I went through the exact same nightmare with my OBGYN. She treated me like a number. She didn't take into account that I was healthy, didn't smoke, barely drank alcohol, nothing. She basically scared the shit out of me and I said "fuck this!" I hired midwives, spent more money then I would have if I had stayed with the OBGYN but I got excellent, personalized care. They came to my house to treat me. It was AWESOME! And, I'm very excited for you guys. Not sure that I knew you were expecting #2....
ReplyDeleteI LOVE this story. You've managed to put into words exactly how I was feeling as you walked me through what happened to you. I just want to give you a big HUG. It will all be ok. I know you know that, but I want to tell you that yes, it will. :)
ReplyDeleteI think you touch on something in this post that jumped out at me as a life long diabetic. It was the unresponsive spiel of the diabetes educator you saw that gave me an Ah Ha moment.
ReplyDeleteYou are younger than middle aged, educated and completely in tune with how your body processes food just as I am. Diabetes educators almost never get exposed to those kinds of people. Ever. Most of their clients have no previous knowledge of nutrition or are maybe elderly and have difficulty understanding tracking glucose levels and dietary guidelines. Lowest common denominator explanations are necessary to keep people from killing themselves with uncontrolled blood sugars.
These educators just don't know how to handle someone that doesn't need to be handled.
Oh and I told the nutritionist I had to see during my pregnancies that she was going to get left in the dust if she didn't start tracking with an app. She learned. I guess that makes me a diabetes educator.
Trust what you know about yourself and your body. Fight the power!
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ReplyDeleteI just came from my first Sweet Success appointment - had a very similar experience. My hemoglobin test came back at 5.7 - right on the borderline - and the Sweet Success nutritionist told me on their chart that meant I should be treated for GD. I'm 12 weeks pregnant and 112 pounds. I do not have GD. She also told me that they JUST changed their standards to bring in women who test at higher blood sugar levels in the first trimester instead of waiting until the actual GD test in the second trimester. I think it's a good thing to be screening pregnant women early so they can be more aware and take preventative action, but when she handed me the big bag of products and had me sign on the dotted line to have my insurance pay for regular shipments of lancets and test strips, etc. I definitely smelled a rat. I am SURE they get more funding for more patients, and bringing in more women in the first trimester equals big bucks. I wish our health system could focus on helping people who really need it instead of wasting everyone's time and money on these kinds of scams.
ReplyDeleteI told my doctor I want a hemoglobin retest and she agreed to give me one. I've also decided I will play along with this ridiculous game for ONE week. Test my blood four times a freaking day (my levels today were in the 80s). If everything looks good, I'm done. I also asked my doctor if this program is mandatory, and she said of course they can't force you to do anything you don't want to do.
P.S. I also laughed at the "light" yogurt suggestion. I've been refined-sugar-free for four years now. I wouldn't touch that stuff with a ten-foot pole. I can't believe a nutritionist would suggest it as part of a healthy diet.
I have had same thing happen. My blood sugar levels have tested in 80s consistently at home when eating good normal food. I was a nationally registered EMT and a senior in biomedical science with minor in premed. I know more than the average barely associate degree trained nutritionist who.just spits out government pamphlets. I too was ready to throttle the lady I talked too. She was encouraging lots of low fat food items for gestational diabetes. Maybe she is unaware but used a companies web site to show their nutritional facts. Low fat generally happens in snacks where fat is removed and a sugar is added. I think she was trying to kill me or maybe she gets a kickback if I listen to the crap and end up on meds.
ReplyDeleteI have had same thing happen. My blood sugar levels have tested in 80s consistently at home when eating good normal food. I was a nationally registered EMT and a senior in biomedical science with minor in premed. I know more than the average barely associate degree trained nutritionist who.just spits out government pamphlets. I too was ready to throttle the lady I talked too. She was encouraging lots of low fat food items for gestational diabetes. Maybe she is unaware but used a companies web site to show their nutritional facts. Low fat generally happens in snacks where fat is removed and a sugar is added. I think she was trying to kill me or maybe she gets a kickback if I listen to the crap and end up on meds.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing very useful information with us.
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